"Who's not expecting what?" his mom asked, heading straight to Piper to give her a hug.
"We're not expecting a baby. Yet. But hold tight, it's not like we're being passive about it," Roman said with a shit eating grin.
"Oh my goodness," Sadie whispered, burying her face in his chest as everyone in the room erupted into cheers and exclamations in half-English, half-Russian.
"Oooh, Nadzieja two," Anna said, sauntering into the room. "Nope. That'd be three, right? Can we call her Zieja? Or Zizi? That's adorable."
"Zizi is cute," Drake chimed in from behind Anna. "What about Nads?"
"Who are we naming?" Zach's dad followed behind Drake, still carrying his accordion.
"Roman and Sadie's eventual kid," Zach said, giving Nadia a squeeze.
"Do not name her after my mother. We already have two. Try something nice like Helen."
"Or maybe Diana?" Mom asked.
"That's a good one, too," Dad agreed.
Sadie groaned with a laugh. "We are not calling our maybe-going-to-happen-someday daughter Nads. We covered this when we were dating."
"Nadzieja means 'hope,'" Roman explained over the commotion. "If it's a girl, I think we could go with Hope."
"Now that's a good name," Dad agreed, adding a few off-key notes for good measure.
Sadie lifted her head, giving her husband a sweet look. "It's perfect."
"What if it's a boy?" Zach asked. "What are you going to name him?"
Roman gave a wicked grin. "Easy. Tractor Beam Kaleidoscope. First name Tractor, middle name Beam Kaleidoscope last name Dvornakov. Very classic."
"Is he serious?" Piper asked, leaning into Zach. He did sound serious.
"I got drunk one night and agreed to it," Sadie said, pulling her lips into a tight line. "I'm totally going with the legal loophole that we cannot enter contracts while intoxicated."
"You weren't that drunk." Roman tsked.
"The name says she was," Zach replied, deadpan.
"If it's a boy we're gonna name him Milo," Sadie assured.
"That is really the opposite end of the naming spectrum from the other option," Piper slid her gaze to Zach.
"We should probably focus on the 'making a baby' part before the naming part." Sadie laughed.
"We should get right on that," Roman said, his voice dropping to a register that made several family members groan.
"Nope," Jase stepped in front of the door. "You do not get to leave dinner early. Because if anyone gets to leave, I'm leaving."
"He's not leaving," Heather added.
"Which means no one leaves." Jase pointed two fingers at his eyes and then back at Roman.
Zach leaned toward Piper. "The only official way to get out of a family gathering is to tie Jase to an appliance. But that has yet to happen."
As Heather whisked Nadia away for cleanup, Anna moved to give Piper a big hug. "I was worried you might decide not to come tonight."
"And miss the chance to see the inner workings of the Dvornakovs? Not a chance," Piper said smoothly.
