Harmony lifted her chin like a badass little miss, stood, and faced Jack with fists clenched. “Bye, Jack.”
Then she strode to the naughty spot and planted her bum there. Glaring at April the entire time.
April swore she saw little dots dancing in her vision. She should talk to Yelena about what a stroke might actually feel like.
She shook the spots away, pretty sure a stroke didn’t involve heartache because a woman’s training wheels left for California.
She’d done this before—the goodbye thing. She’d done the hate thing, too. Harmony had blamed her for her dad’s departure.
In Kent’s case, he hadn’t stuck around to say goodbye to the kids the night he decided to leave. He’d gone even more of the clean break route, not coming home again for a few weeks. Then he showed up with divorce papers. He’d decided to leave, so then he left.
Jack stayed because he couldn’t leave without the goodbyes. He was probably right that this would make it easier on everyone. Leave it to Fix It Jack to know how to give April what she wanted.
And this wasexactlywhat she wanted to happen. Jack was leaving to go back to doing Jack things. She’d stay in Denver and do April things.
He would help someone else.
She would prove herself.
But with everyone winning, why did it feel as though she’d lost?
He gave Lola a quick kiss on the head. “Bye, princess.”
Lola gave him a full princess smile.
“April.” Jack didn’t break the invisible thread binding them. He also didn’t touch her. Not in front of the kids, even though her body was screaming for her to reach out for that last chance at contact. “You’ve got this,” he said with such force that she absolutely believed him.
She nodded. She did. She knew she did. She had this.
So why did it feel so wrong?
With a quick clip to the invisible thread that she didn’t see coming, he gave them all one last glance, and then he left. A quick, supposed-to-be-painless break that dissolved any residual numb.
“Mama,” Lola said again, this time with more earnestness. She must’ve sensed her mother’s need for solidarity. That was ridiculously sweet. Or perhaps Lola just needed reassurance when their world was going to go through another transition. Also very sweet.
“Give me a second.” April closed her eyes, took a deep, deep breath.
She could breathe. Everything would be just fine.
“Mama,” Lola said again, patting April’s cheeks.
April leaned in to hear what she had to say, just as a warm liquid covered her hip.
“I needed to go potty,” Lola said with a horrified look on her face.
And April? April cleaned it up.
Chapter Thirty-Four
“You will never be the perfect parent. The moment you accept that and understand that doing your best in that moment is all you can do, the better you’ll be.”
—Amanda, Florida, United States
April
“I’m not nervous,” April said for the third time. The words were mostly for her benefit, not Rachel’s. Rachel, who leaned back to check April’s level of forehead shine before the live started.
She squinted before she dabbed a bit more powder on April’s forehead. Moved to a different angle. Then added a touch more.
