At that, she softened. The hard edges of her dedication to stress-free vacation living melted a little more.
“Not that I really mind being a consolation prize. Usually,” he continued. “But with you...it wasn’t something I’d be able to move on from. Being with you when you’d rather be with…him.”
Becca straddled his stomach and sat up, cowgirl-style. “I don’t want to be with him.”
His lazy gaze trailed over her. “Well, I know that now.”
“Can we dig deeper into this?” she asked, nearly at a whisper.
“Can we not?” He pressed the bulge of his erection against her center. His desire for another go was as obvious as the night was dark and morning was just around the corner. Her pulse beat hard in her ears as desire shoved her rational brain to the side.
“You want to know why I really didn’t go further?” Linx repeated her question, but he didn’t glance to her. Not at first. Finally, he moved his gaze to her. “More than the shit with that guy.” He wouldn’t say Bax’s name. Hadn’t said it since he came back from his chat with Courtney. “I held back becauseyoumatter.”
The pulse pounding in her ears stuttered.
“I matter?” she asked. Actually, it sounded more like a squeak. Who was really paying that much attention?
Linx, apparently. His expression warmed—a softness in contrast to the hard planes of his jawline.
“I haven’t had a lot of women in my bed who mattered beyond what we shared with our bodies,” he said, gripping her waist, pressing her against him.
Do not evaluate his statements. Do not do it. Don’t psychoanalyze. This is not an intake session. He’s not a patient.
“You’re different. I don’t want to screw that up,” he continued.
She shouldn’t have, but she tried to dissect his words. She came up empty. The buzzing in her ears did not allow her to think clearly.
“I don’t understand,” she said.
“I like you. A whole lot.” That got her the wide Linx grin she should just go on ahead and patent. “You matter.” He reached his hand to her chin and traced his fingertip along her neck. “I don’t want to screw up what I hope could come of you and me.”
Right. He was saying that if she were to unpack his emotional baggage, he might not take the suitcases and leave? Was that what he was saying?
Because if that’s what he was saying, that was dangerous for her heart.
He didn’t talk for a long moment. Neither did she.
“I’m feeling my way through this,” he said, finally. “I don’t want to go too fast. Too slow. I want to be what you need me to be.”
Oh. That was… that was… huh.
“Without Dimefront, I can focus on us.” He tucked a lock of hair behind her ear.
She swallowed and refused to succumb to the intense desire to grab her clothes, grab her keys, and run away. “This isn’t reality.”
His eyebrows furrowed together. “Why?”
Why? “Because it’s fun.”
“Can’t life be fun?” He asked as he ran his hands up and down her bare sides as though she were a skittish animal he was doing his best not to spook.
Too bad, though. She was already spooked.
“Life is hard, Linx.”
He moved his hands when she attempted to stand. Letting her go. Which was good because she had a lot to think about.
“Vacations are fun. Life. It just isn’t.” She crossed her arms near her belly as he rose from the stage floor.
