“You’ve never cared about me,” I said before I could stop myself, but it was true. Dante had been right.I’dbeen right, even when I didn’t want to admit it to myself. I’d moved to Otter Bay for a clean break from Brady because I knew he’d never really cared about me. “You’ve never been there for me when I needed you, you only ever showed up when it was convenient for you. I shouldn’t have to live like that. I deserve better.”
I wasn’t the kind of man who stood up for himself like that, not normally. Definitely not to Brady.
But with Milo standing beside me I felt like I could take on the world. Like I could do anything.
Brady held his hands up in surrender. “Maybe you do,” he said, looking at Milo again. “Hope he’s better.”
He backed up a few paces, then turned, dropping his hands and shoving them into the pockets of his jacket, walking away past the florist and into the dark.
I’d never seen his shoulders slump like that before. Part of me felt sorry for him, but the rest of me knew Milowasbetter. Milo was amazing.
He loved me. Brady never had.
“Let’s go inside,” Milo said, still watching Brady retreat.
36
MILO
My stomach was tiedup in knots as I watched Xander sleep peacefully beside me, a stray beam of moonlight catching the curve of his shoulder where it was sticking out from under the blankets.
I slipped out of bed as quietly as I could, glancing at my phone for the time. Four in the morning. That gave me an hour before Xander’s alarm.
I grabbed my clothes, unwilling to risk dressing in the bedroom in case Xander woke and caught me. I wasn’t up to explaining myself right now. Not without it turning into a whole messy scene.
The last thing I wanted was a fight. I didn’t want Xander to look back on me, ever, and remember us fighting. What we’d had was perfect, and I wanted it to stay that way.
Once I’d tip-toed to the bedroom door I paused to look back at him, biting my lip. He looked… he was…
I loved him. I loved him like I hadn’t realized I could love anyone, like I hadn’t realized anyone would ever let me.
But he was right. And I loved him. And that meant…
I turned away from the door before I could change my mind, barely avoiding tripping over a kitten as I made my way to the kitchen counter where I’d seen the stack of old envelopes he used as scrap paper and the pen he left with them.
Xander had been right earlier. He deserved better.
My heart pounded in my ears as I scribbled a note on one, shoving it to the middle of the counter so he’d notice it first thing. It made me feel like the coward I knew I was, but this was kinder to both of us, and I was doing the right thing, wasn’t I?
Xander deserved someone who’d be there for him. He deserved better.
Brady was right to doubt that I was better. I wanted to be. I wanted to be more than anything.
But I’d just be exactly like him. Only around when it was convenient for me.
I couldn’t do that to Xander. Not after Brady. He needed someone who was around whenever he wanted them, always within arm’s reach.
I wished that someone could be me, but I was leaving. Icouldn’tstay.
“Hey,” I said quietly, crouching down to pet Luna’s head when she rubbed it against my leg. “Do me a favor, okay? You look after Xander for me. He’s gonna need you.”
Luna made a tiny, sad meow, like she knew exactly what I was up to.
“Promise me,” I said, giving her one last pet and then straightening up to pull my clothes on. Luna sat and watched, glancing over at the bedroom door from time to time. I wasn’t sure if she was keeping watch or judging me.
Probably judging. I deserved it, if she was.
“Goodbye, sweetheart,” I said, heading for the door that led to the bakery. “You’re still my favorite.”
