If he and Kieran had swapped ages, my life would’ve been very different.
Aiden would’ve been the best friend I’d grown up with, and we would’ve done everything together, and…
And there would’ve been cuddles like this, and half a dozen secret kisses that were just to see if we liked it.
And I would’ve liked it, and I would’ve spent my whole life in love with my best friend.
“I don’t mind,” I said, drying the last of his tears with the tips of my fingers, turning that thought over in my head.
I knew Iwould havebeen in love with Aiden when we were kids.
Because I’d fallen in love with him now.
The thought was sudden and terrifying and half of me wished I could un-think it, but it was alsotrue, and it wasn’t going anywhere.
I loved him.
I didn’t want to be thrown back in the dating pool. I didn’t want to go back to reality at all. WhatIwanted was to stay here, just like this, snuggled up close to him, warm and happy even though the world outside was harsh and cold, even though we’d both been hurt, even though this should’ve been impossible.
Aiden’s breath hitched as I kissed him again, fingers buried deep in his hair, cradling his skull as gently as I could. Silently promising him that I was here, and I wanted him to feel like he could say these things to me, that I’d always listen and that I cared.
“Aiden,” I said, barely louder than a breath as I pulled back, his pretty eyes glinting at me, still sparkling like jewels in the twinkling lights we’d left on overhead so any would-be rescuers could see if they got in here while we were asleep.
“I…”
Tell him.
I wanted to. I wanted this to be the first time I’d ever told someone I loved them and meant it, meant that I wanted them body and soul for as long as they’d have me.
“My dad is your dad, okay?” I said instead, taking the coward’s way out at the last moment.
I’d used up all my bravery for the year telling Mom that I wasn’t going to throw him under the bus because she didn’t like him.
Should’ve realized then that I’d end up here, wanting to offer my heart to a man who’d have to be stupid to accept it.
Aiden smiled again, soft and content, and I wondered how the hell I could cope without seeing that smile on a daily basis. Aiden’s smiles were addictive, and the withdrawal was already starting to hurt.
“Okay,” he said. “I like him. He’s cool.”
I settled down next to Aiden again, letting my head rest on his shoulder and my eyes fall closed as he stroked my hair.
We weren’t going home just yet. I could enjoy this while it lasted.
22
Aiden
I woketo Carter’s mom staring down at me, which was about the worst way to wake up I could imagine.
Carter was still asleep, lying comfortably in my arms, more vulnerable than I’d ever seen him.
I tightened my grip on him, prepping for a fight.
Mrs. K looked down at me, lips pursed, eyes cold in the morning light streaming through the open, cleared doorway.
Let her talk first. Don’t start anything.
My brain was probably giving me good advice. Advice I definitely should’ve followed.
