I needed a minute, and Icould feel Ashley getting more and more worried, and I didn’t want him tosee me like this.
“I’m fine,” I gritted out,the effort taking up all the concentration I had.
A tear rolled down my cheekwithout my permission, eyes watering at the pain. My stomach cramped at thethought of a client seeing me like this.
Unprofessionalwas the keywordfor this whole job. I couldn’t stop screwing up.
“You’re not,” Ashley said. “Waveme away if I’m making it worse, or tell me what I can do to help.”
I couldn’t wave him away.Even if I didn’t want him to see me like this, sending him away would hurt him.
He’d been hurt enough. All Iwanted to do was protect him.
“It’s just pain,” I said,breathing through my nose. I knew how to deal with this. I was strong enough.
Beinghurtwasn’t the same asbeingweak.
That was so goddamn hard tobelieve when I was in pain. When I couldn’t stand or evenspeak.
“Aspirin oribuprofen?”Ashley asked, straightening up.
I shook my head. “Can’t take anymore.”
His face fell, which wasexactly what I didn’t want.
“Why didn’t you tell me youwere sore? Jesus, Logan, I’ve had you running up and down stairs all day. Iwould never… if I’dknown.”
The stairs hadn’t helped. Flatsurfaces were fine, I could still walk a long way on the sidewalk, but stairswere a killer. Too much pressure on my thigh going up, too much shock goingdown.
But that wasn’t Ashley’sfault, and now I’d upset him, andI’d have to explain myself.
Stomach twisting, I noddedto the spot beside me on the sofa and let my head fall back, eyes closed.
The worst of the pounding inmy head was easing off. It was so hard to explain to people what this kind ofpain was like, how much energy it took, how it affected my whole stupid,useless body when it was like this.
Ashley perched on the edgeof the cushions, so light they barely shifted.
“I’m here,” he said. Ishouldn’t have needed the reassurance, but it feltgood.
He’d said earlier that he feltsafe around me. What I felt around him wasn’tsafety, exactly, but itwas a kind of calm.
It was easier to take deepbreaths and push my way past the pain with Ashley sitting there, waiting for meto recover.
Thin fingers slipped into myhand, holding it loosely. Another reassurance, silent and comforting andexactly what I needed.
I could have kissed him, andI was in too much pain to even consider dismissing that thought right now.Ashley’spresence made me happy.
That was allkindsofbad, but it wasn’t as bad as the pain, so I let it happen and squeezed his hand,grateful for his patience.
“I didn’t mean to snap atyou,” Ashley said. “I just hate seeing anyone suffer and I panicked.”
“It’s fine.” I took a deepbreath, gathering my thoughts. Where to start?
“This is breakthrough pain,”I began. “I can’t take any more over-the-counter stuff. I have a prescription,and I normally have something to take when it gets worse. But I forgot torefill it.”
“There’s a drug store on thecorner,” Ashley said. “I’ll go.”
I shook my head again. “Also forgot theprescription.”
