I was a different personthis morning.
I was allowed to eat junkfood. I was allowed to have sex. I was allowed to… to want to fall in lovewith a beautiful boy who’d been so kind to me it was hard to believe he wasreal.
Uncle Vincent couldn’t stop me.No onecould stop me.
Fox had shown me that I didn’t need to followall these stupid rules. That the world wouldn’t come crashing down around myears if I ate a candy bar or let him hold me in my own kitchen.
“Can we have sex again?” Iasked, my mouth getting a half-step ahead of my brain.
This was what I wanted.Screw Uncle Vincent’srules. Screw toeing the line to keep the recordcompany happy.
I hadn’t realized untilI’d met Fox just how much I was giving up. At twenty-three, I should have beenenjoying my life. Not living like a monk, afraid of the ruling hand of therecord company coming down and smacking me into oblivion because I split apizza with a hot guy.
Or had sex with him.
It wasn’t enough, and Iwasn’t giving it up now that I knew whatliving my lifewas like. Iwanted to have sex with Fox and eat pastries with him and not be miserable allthe time for the sake of my so-called career. Chocolate croissants and peanutbutter cups and cheap pizza weren’t what was standing between me and success.
I could work hard for what Iwantedandhave fun from time to time. They weren’t mutuallyexclusive.
“Now?” Fox frowned, glancingat the kitchen clock as though it was a question about how fast we could getoff.
“Later,” I clarified.
Fox broke into a broad grin.“Yes.We can have sex later,” he said. “Now go and get dressed before Idodrag you outthere in your underwear.”
Laughter echoed off thewalls as I headed for the bedroom.
Things were going to bedifferent from now on.
SIXTEEN
FOX
Everything about Quinn wasdifferent today. He smiled more easily, laughed more brightly, and worked witha kind of quiet determination that I couldn’t help being proud of.
Had I done this?
No, notme. Havingsupport had done this. I could have been anyone. This wasn’t about me.
And that was okay. I didn’t evenwantit to be aboutme. As long as Quinn got this album finished without a hiccup, then I’d done my job,and I could go home happy. Hopefully, the rumor that I’d do anything to help aclient wouldn’t spread.
Like I kept telling myself,Quinn was a special case.
As I watched him listeningto the final version of the song he’d recorded yesterday, I couldn’t helpworrying about how true that was becoming. I’d been telling myself that he wasjustadorable, andthen he wasjustso sweet and needy, and thenjusta lot of funin bed. But the things I liked about him were starting to pile up.
I liked it when he smiled atme.
That was the most damning ofall. I liked his smile. He was pretty when he smiled.
He was pretty all the time.
And then he’d eaten my burntpancakes this morning and stood in the middle of the kitchen for a cuddle,letting me pour my heart out to him.
“Hey, Fox?” Quinn spoke up,jarring me out of my thoughts. I hadn’t even noticed him take the headphonesoff. “I, uh… this is stupid, but, umm. I had Dave make a version of this, umm.Of the song we recorded yesterday. That only plays on the one channel,” hesaid.
I waited for the rest, sincethat wasn’tnearly enough information for me to know how I was supposed to respond.
“So if you wanted to listento it… it’s mixed so it’s as much like it’s intended as possible with only onesound channel. For one ear, I mean. It’s okay if you don’t care.”
