“Gone as in…?”
“As in he was fired byHarmony because of the song leaking. No, because…” I sighed.
I had to tell the truth.
“Because instead of takingthe blame myself, I let him take it. And he just… accepted it.”
Lucy made a soft,sympathetic noise.
“I saw the way he looked atyou, too,” she said. “And this isn’t your fault. He knows that. I’msurehe knows that. Youshould call him.”
The thought of doing thatmade my stomach swoop.
“What about a text?”
“If that’s easier for you,sure.”
A text was the most I couldhandle right now, and even that filled me with dread as I pulled up Fox’s number.
What could I say? All I wanted… all I wantedwas a chance to see him, explain myself, and maybe get a hug out of it.
Fox
Well. That was a start.
I’ll be home afterfive
I wanted to be homenow,but I needed to finish this album. I didn’t know what I was doingwith my life after today. I had a lot of decisions to make. But there was nopoint in letting this one last project stay incomplete.
Fox would understand that,wouldn’the? It was what he’d tell me to do. He didn’t seem like the kind of man wholeft a job unfinished.
you could come pick upyour stuff then
That was perfect. An excusefor him to come over. An excuse for me to see him again.
Everything would be okayonce I could see him again. I’d explain myself and everything Lucy had told me andwhat a complete idiot I’d been, and Fox would forgive me, and maybe we’d evenride off into the sunset together.
I sent the text before Icould lose my nerve, and only realized after I’d done it that I hadn’tmanaged to saysorry, which was the main thing I’d been trying to getacross. Iwassorry.
Should I send a second text?Would that bother him?
And would it look stupid nowthat it wasn’tthe first thing I’d thought of?
Maybe it was better to savemy apology for when I saw him in person. He couldn’t leave everything he’dcome with behind, could he? We would have had to meet up at some point for himto collect it.
“Done?” Lucy asked, just asour coffee arrived.
I nodded.
I wasn’t sure I feltbetter, but I didn’t feel anyworse. That’d have to be good enough.
There was alotofthinking in my future.
“Awesome,” she said. “Drinkyour coffee and then I’ll walk you down to the studio. That is… if you’replanning on finishing this album up?”
I had to. If I walked awaynow, I was closing off all my options. If I finished this, I was leaving themopen. One more day of misery was worth that, wasn’t it?
And then I needed to sitdown and think seriously about what I wanted to do.
