“Oh.” I finally realizedwhat he was talking about as I looked at the jar myself.
“Right, yeah,” I agreed. “But…I…”
Explaining myself withoutexplaining what happened was going to prove impossible. Not that Fox would havepushed for an explanation, but I owed him one. I’d lost a client—a client weneeded—and I might have dragged his reputation down with my own, too.
“Miles fired me. Or atleast, I think he fired me.” I said, reaching out to play with the jar. “Heloves this stuff.”
“And you’re hoping to winhim back with gifts?” Fox asked, somehow verbally raising his eyebrow. I didn’teven have to glance up to imagine the look on his face.
“No, I… well… yeah, kinda…”
“I feel as though I might bemissing something.”
Right, yeah. Fox knew aboutthe hookup, but he didn’t know about… the rest.
I needed to tell him. Iowedhim that. We were partners in this, and whatever I did on the job reflected onhim, too.
The moment I looked up, hisface fell.
“Oh no,” he said, andreally, I should have known that he’d be able to read me like a book. “You’vefallen for him.”
That…
Wasn’t the response I’d beenexpecting.
Shouldn’t he have beenyelling at me for being unprofessional, for maybe tankingbothof our careersbefore they even took off, for… for being such anidiotabout all this?
I swallowed. It was thetruth, but I wasn’t sure I was ready to face it. Being in love with Miles justmeant I’d lost that much more by screwing up today.
“I…” I paused, struggling tocome up withsomethingto say. Anything. An explanation, a plea for mercy,even a denial. “I’m sorry.”
Which, again, was at leastthetruth. Fox trusted me, and I trusted Fox. We’d never lied to each otherbefore and I didn’t plan on starting now, no matter how stupid and hopeless Ifelt.
“Gray, my love, you don’tneed to be sorry for that,” Fox said softly. “You may well need to be sorry forother things, but love is rare and precious and worth grabbing hold of. You’vebeen wandering around with a heart that won’t quite mend for years.”
I finally looked away fromthe jar of cookie butter and up at Fox’s face, seeing nothing but sympathy there.
No judgment. Not even thefaintest hint that he was mad.
“He was so easy to fall inlove with,” I said, only realizing it myself as I said it aloud. “Exactly whatI’ve been looking for all this time. Sweet and kind and… and heneededme.”
“Ah, the secret weakness ofmen like you and I,” Fox said. “Hard to say no when they’re all puppy eyes anddesperate for a cuddle.”
“Yeah.” I sighed. “Yeah, he…I mean, there was more than that. He took me to meet this kid who’s got cancer,and it turns out he goes to visit her every time she’s in for chemo, and he’sheading up the research project to cure her, because he had it too. And that’sjust a detail but he’s just… he’slikethat, y’know? Goodhearted. He’s got all that family money, he could absolutely be an asshole, buthe’snot.”
“Pretty?” Fox asked,settling in for what he obviously expected to be a long conversation.
“So pretty,” I said. “He’sgot these eyes… when the light hits them, it’s like sunlight streaming througha whiskey glass.”
Fox raised an eyebrow. “It’s likewhat?” he asked.
I licked my lips.
Shit.
I should have realized backwhen I first made that comparison that I was screwed, huh? That was practicallypoetry.
And now Iwasscrewed, anyway.
