Mike smiled at that, used to Ezra’s rants about irresponsible bird ownership. Few people knew how to take care of birds they bought at the pet store or found in the wild, and plenty of them had ended up here. Some never left.
Kestrels were short-lived. Four or five years in the wild at most, maybe a little more if they were looked after properly in captivity. Millie wasn’t a juvenile, on closer inspection, so she’d probably spend the rest of her life here.
At least she’d have Ezra. There were worse fates for a bird.
There were worse fates in general. Anyone who could say Ezra was on their side was lucky to have him.
“So no idea what happened to her toe?” Mike asked, watching Millie start to edge toward them, curious. The fact that she’d been kept as a pet explained why she’d been so easy for Ezra to handle.
“None,” Ezra said. “Doesn’t seem to bother her. And she really is a sweetheart. She’ll take the mouse right out of your hand, if you wanna feed her later.”
“Maybe,” Mike responded, reaching out to offer Millie his hand to step up onto. She was small enough not to need his arm, and hopped up the moment he was within reach.
A smile spread across Mike’s face as he felt her talons tighten around his fingers. He’d missed this. There was nothing quite like having a bird choose to sit on you. Even if ithadbeen a pet.
“She likes you!” Ezra enthused. “I mean, of course she does, you’re very likeable.”
“Thanks,” Mike said, reaching out cautiously to stroke her chest, like Ezra had showed him when he’d first come here. Ezra had always been so damnedgoodto him. “Ezra, listen…”
“We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t wanna talk about it,” Ezra interrupted as Mike paused to find the words he needed for this.
“We do, though,” Mike said, still stroking Millie for comfort. Ezra was right, shewasa sweetheart. “Because I need to tell you that I’m having trouble figuring out my feelings. If I’m being weird, it’s becauseI’mbeing weird, y’know? Not because of you. You’ve been awesome, and I’m so grateful.”
“You’re welcome,” Ezra said softly, reaching out to pet Millie as well. “You don’t have to have all your feelings figured out, either.”
Mike sighed. He heard what Ezra was saying, but some part of him knew that if he didn’t figure them outsoonand act accordingly, he’d screw up their friendship forever. Not because Ezra was mean or pushy or anything, but because he had feelingstoo, and it was Mike’s responsibility not to hurt them.
That was what friendship was about, and Mike had been a crappy friend for the past few years. He still had making up to do.
And that needed to start with some serious soul searching.
Soul searching he was a little afraid of evenstarting. There were a lot of things he suddenly expected to find in there that scared him.
“Everything feels different here,” he said, letting Millie back up onto a perch as she got restless. “At the sanctuary, I mean. When I drove through the gates the first time, it was like driving into a whole different world.”
“Yeah,” Ezra said. “I know the feeling. This place is… special.”
“You can say that again,” Mike said, backing away from Millie cautiously. He’d dressed in lighter colors today, a sage green sweater that everyone said brought out his eyes. For Millie, he’d told himself.
But really, for Ezra. Some part of him, at least, wanted Ezra to look at him and see someone attractive.
“This place is special,” Ezra said, grinning at Mike as he opened the aviary door again. Mike rolled his eyes, but he couldn’t help a tiny smile in response.
Justbeingwith Ezra again felt so damned good.
“You’ve really never changed, huh?” Mike asked as he slipped out of the aviary again, glad he’d made up with Millie. As much as she’d scaredhim, he’d felt guilty for scaring her, too.
“You don’t think?” Ezra asked, raising an eyebrow.
“I mean…” Mike shoved his hands in his pockets, and then shrugged. “You’re older and wiser, I guess. You havechanged, like everyone changes, but you’re still you. I was half-afraid I’d barely recognize you. But I do. You’re still the same Ezra who was my best friend for so long. Still warm, and funny, and kind. And you still care so much about this place. I dunno what my point is, I’m just… relieved, I guess. That you’re still here.”
“It’s been good to see you again, too,” Ezra said. “So yeah, I get what you mean. You’re still the same Mike, for what it’s worth. I missed you.”
“I missed you, too,” Mike responded, and he couldn’t remember if he’d said that before, but if he had, it feltdifferentthis time. Like they were finally talking about the things they needed to talk about.
One of the things, anyway. There was a whole lot going on, and they’d have to talk aboutallof it, eventually.
Especially the part where Mike desperately wanted to kiss Ezra again, but wasn’t sure he was allowed to. He’d run away so fast after, still confused and unsure, that he had no idea what yesterday hadbeen.
