She didn’t want that for her son, and Julian… Julian didn’t want that for himself, either. Even if all he could manage now was to patch things up with Isaac so they stayed friends, he didn’t want to lose him entirely.
His stomach still churned as he walked inside, worried about how Isaac was going to react to him.
The crowd was practically impenetrable inside, people milling about so closely their shoulders brushed against each other. The air suddenly felt suffocating, as though having this many people in one room was using up all the oxygen.
Julian excused himself from Mrs. Hudson’s side, seeking out a flute of champagne and as quiet a corner as he could, trying to make himself look as uninteresting as possible in case someone decided he looked lonely and could use someone to talk to.
The only someone he wanted to talk to was Isaac.
He had no idea what he was going to say. There was too much going through his head, too many thoughts to boil down to a few neatly-ordered sentences.
SorryandI love youprobably needed to come first. Those seemed like important things to say.
The crowd turned as one to the stage when the screech of audio equipment being turned on filled the room. Julian looked up as well, seeing a greying man in what wasdefinitelya hired tuxedo standing behind the podium.
Julian was suddenly much happier with his choice of a sensible, plain black suit and pale pink shirt. He’d planned the outfit days ago, sending a picture for Isaac’s approval.
Isaac had immediately said thathewanted a pink shirt, which had made Julian grin like an idiot for a solid three minutes before one of his colleagues caught him and asked him what he was so happy about.
His stomach turned again. The thought of having lost that, the simple joy of justtalkingto Isaac, made him want to throw up. All he wanted was to bask in Isaac’s presence. Maybe hold on tight to him, if he’d allow it.
The speeches seemed to go on for hours, though the occasional glance at his phone told Julian they were actually only a few minutes each. It was just that every person talking somehow managed to be more boring than the last.
Julian focused on the stage again when he heard Isaac’s name.
He watched Isaac appear from somewhere off to the side, walking over as a gorgeous blonde in a shimmery gold dress that hugged her curves handed him the heart-shaped trophy he’d won.
Julian’s heart swelled with pride. No matter how mad he had been with Isaac, or how unsure and worried he was now, he wasproudof him.
He’d always been proud of him.
All he wanted was for Isaac to be proud back.
Isaac cleared his throat as he stood behind the podium, setting the trophy down awkwardly.
“This is the part I suck at, so I’ll try to make it short,” he said, making a ripple of polite laughter run through the audience. “I, uh, I actually have something specific to say this time. First of all, I’ve never actually come out publicly, so I’m doing it now. I’m bisexual, and I’ve been dating this really great guy.”
Thatgot Julian’s attention. He looked up to meet Isaac’s eyes, only to find Isaac staring right back at him.
His heart fluttered in his chest.
“This really great guy who I love, and who I probably don’t deserve. He’s been there for me every step of the way, and I’m proud to call him my best friend as well as my boyfriend. That is, uh… if he’ll accept this as an apology.”
Tears welled up in Julian’s eyes, a lump forming in his throat. His chest felt tight, all the air in the room leaving all over again, making it impossible to draw a breath.
Instead of trying to say anything, he just met Isaac’s eyes and nodded.
The way Isaac’s face lit up would have outshone a thousand suns.
Isaac loved him. The realization hit Julian with full force, his heart hammering in his chest.
Isaaclovedhim.
Loved him so much that he was apologizing in front of all these people, because he didn’t want to lose him.
Julian missed the rest of whatever Isaac said, still busy processing the part he’d heard.
Ofcoursehe’d accept that as an apology. It was more than he’d ever have asked for.
