Chapter Eighteen
Reid woke to an empty bed, reaching over to feel the space Gabriel had left behind. There was only the faintest trace of warmth left, a lingering reminder that he’d been here.
Gabriel had woken Reid before he left, kissing him goodbye and thanking him, which had been nice. Plenty of people left without saying anything.
It would have been better if Gabriel had stayed, but Reid hadn’t really expected that. He’d murmured something about having work to do, and Reid knew he’d already taken time away from it to come and see him.
There was something bothering Reid, though, and he couldn’t get the thought out of his mind.
Gabriel said thishadbeen a good experiment, as though it was over, and now Reid wasn’t sure if he’d ever see him again.
The thought that maybe that was true was enough to make his stomach knot up. Maybe he’d been convenient and hot enough for Gabriel to take his attraction to men for a test drive, and now Gabriel didn’t need him anymore.
Maybe he’d move on and find someone better. Someone more to his tastes.
Gabriel didn’t seem like the kind of person who’d intentionally use someone, but Reid had been used by otherwise nice guys before. And where he’d thought Gabriel was a shy nerd, he’d actually discovered that he was happy to ask for what he wanted.
That made sense, now that Reid thought of it. People who weren’t assertive didn’t bargain their way onto a space shuttle, even if theydiddesign it.
Not that it was a bad thing, just… Reid had been looking for someone safe. Someone whowouldn’ttake what they wanted and then walk away.
He wasn’t sure Gabrielhaddone that, but the sinking feeling that maybe it was all over between them still hung over him as he got up to put the coffee pot on, his head fuzzy.
Aside from feeling a little used, Reid was disappointed because helikedGabriel. Genuinely liked him, felt a connection between them. He hadn’t met anyone he felt even a little connected to in a long time, not since he really settled into his career.
Reid rarely felt understood. Gabriel made him feel that way.
It would have been a shame to lose him.
Reid chewed on his lip as the coffee machine gurgled on the counter, tapping his fingers on the granite, watching it sparkle in the sunlight streaming in through the window Gabriel liked so much.
He reached for his phone, hesitating as he picked it up.
Should he wait for Gabriel to get in touch with him again? He didn’t want to crowd the guy, and he was clearly short on free time right now.
Although, Reid suspected Gabriel wasalwaysshort on free time. He seemed like the kind of person who’d fill any available moment with work.
Reid had been like that once, too. In a lot of ways, he was lucky he’d been benched before he burned out. Balance was a lot easier to find when you’d been physically forced to watch the world go by and do very little else for the better part of a year.
After another few moments of thought, Reid unlocked his phone, navigating to Gabriel’s contact details. Gabriel wouldn't have hesitated to text. He’d been happy to ask for whatever he wanted.
The thing was, though, that asking for sex and asking to be someone's boyfriend were two different things.
Sex was easy, relationships were hard.
Reid wasn’t going to ask Gabriel to be his boyfriend.
He just wanted to ask if Gabriel wanted to see him again, maybe with their clothesonfor most of the night this time. Maybe in public.
Maybe like a real date.
… he was totally going to ask if Gabriel wanted to be his boyfriend. Not in as many words, but that was what itamountedto.
He opened up a new text and paused, again, before taking a deep breath and deciding that he had toask. He’d regret it if he didn’t.
I had fun last night,he started, unsure what to say next.
Do you want to…
No, not a question. That didn’t seem right. He deleted it to start again.
I had a great time last night,Reid typed.I was thinking-
He paused.
The safe way to do this was to open with the first part and let Gabriel respond—or not respond. That meant that Reid didn’t have to put his heart out there unprovoked, with no idea how Gabriel would react.
He deleted theI was thinkingand sent the text before he could change his mind.
It was in Gabriel’s hands, now, and he’d just have to accept whatever happened next.
