Chapter One
Taking a Knee (phr.)
1.In roller derby, the act of dropping to one knee when another player is injured on the track, as a sign of respect, and to allow them to get help.
2.‘Getting down on one knee’, as in a proposal of marriage.
Noah hated to sit out any part of practice, but there was hardly any point in him being there today anyway. Not with the way things had gone for him this week. He stared down at the email on his phone for the hundredth time, his stomach knotting up even more than it already had been.
Cutbacks. Trim the fat. Last in, first out.
All phrases he never wanted to see again. Life had obviously gotten a little too easy for him. The cosmos had to turn around and kick him in the teeth eventually.
He would have traded it for an actual kick in the teeth any day of the week. He could take those. Hehadtaken those and gotten up immediately to keep playing. This was… this was something else.
“Hey,” Jace rolled to a stop in front of him, forcing Noah to look up. Noah watched him take his mouth guard out so they could talk. “Sorry about how hard I knocked you before. You usually take it a little better than that.”
“I’m fine,” Noah assured him, sighing. “Just a little distracted.”
Jace sat down next to him, his knee pads creaking as he lowered himself. “Wanna talk about it?”
Noah laughed bitterly. Trust Jace to remind him of why he was so upset. Why he didn’t want to leave this team or the people in it. Especially Jace, who’d been his best friend since practically the moment they met.
“I lost my job. Tomorrow’s my last day,” he said.
“Crap. Sorry, man. So you’re job hunting?”
Noah shook his head. “I’m here on a non-immigration visa. It’s specific to that job. So I guess I’m… leaving.”
The job, he could live without. He had savings, and he had skills. He could find another one. Except without the job he came for, he was going to lose his visa and be forced to go back to Canada. Montreal was a long, long way from Baltimore.
He could find a new roller derby team back home, but it wouldn’t bethisteam. This team that he loved, that he’d found a home-away-from-home in.Histeam, where they’d made him team captain at the start of this season because they believed in him, because they all fit together. That wasn’t something you could just find elsewhere.
He’d never get an immigration visa fast enough, and he was fairly sure he’d have to leave the country to apply anyway. So that meant this was probably his last practice session. There was no point in continuing to show up if he was leaving soon. The team needed to pick a new captain and move on.
“Jesus. Do you need, like… a hug?” Jace offered.
Noah did need a hug. He needed a lot more than a hug. “I need a hug, a drink, and a green card,” he said.
“Well, the first two I can do. The third one… I dunno what to tell you. If you wanted to be a nurse, there’s plenty of room for those. You could get a study visa.”
“Thanks, but no. I don’t know how you do it. I couldn’t deal with people all the time like that. Especially not sick people. Sickkids,” Noah said. He admired Jace’s choice of career as a pediatric nurse. The thought of doing it alone made him uncomfortable. He could barely put up with himself when he was sick. How Jace did it without having a breakdown after every shift was a mystery to him.
Jace pulled him into a bear hug, squeezing him tight. He was a big guy, which was what made him the perfect blocker. It was hard to get past a man who was a little over six feet tall and built like a lumberjack. It also made him great at hugs, and now Noah regretted all the times he hadn’t asked Jace for a hug. He’d miss the opportunity for more of them.
“It’s gonna suck to lose you. You’re our best chance at going to the nationals next year.”
Noah blushed. That wasn’t quite true. It was a good team. They could elect a new captain in a heartbeat, and while jammer was an important position, it mostly required speed and an unhealthy lack of fear, which weren’t necessarily unique qualities. Noah had always run head-first into things, so doing it in derby seemed natural. The team didn’t need Noah anywhere near as much as he’d come to need them.
“You’ll be fine without me,” Noah said, knowing it was true. They were most of the way through the season now anyway, and they only had to win each of the next three games by a handful of points to qualify for the national competition next year.
“We’ll miss you,” Jace insisted. “And we’re nearly through with the season. You sure you can’t just overstay? I’ll hide you in my apartment if the feds come for you.”
“I appreciate the offer, but I’d like to be able to come back. It’s not forever. It’s just for a while, I guess. With no guarantee that I can come back to Baltimore.” Noah swallowed. He didn’t want to cry in front of his teammates, but he did want to cry. He’d built a life in Baltimore, and he didn’t want to have to leave it all behind.
The derby team were his family. Leaving them because of something so simple and stupid as immigration laws was enough to break his heart.
“Hey, we might come up against each other someday, if we make nationals. Then I can kick your ass for real.”
