She’s quiet, too quiet, and that sets off something in me.
I draw my hand slowly up her back, coaxing her to look at me. “What’s going on in that head of yours?” Her eyes lift to mine, wide and guarded, but the way her lips tremble tells me she’s fighting something bigger than nerves.
She swallows hard, her fingers curling into my chest likesheneeds the anchor. “We’ll go slow, Mads. Fuck everything else I said.”
“It’s not that,” she barely says above a whisper. “I want everything with you, Nate. Everything that’s us. Hard, fast, slow, dirty, fun—whatever you give me, I’ll always want it. But…” She gulps and continues her exploration of my body. “But I’m nervous.”
“You never have to be nervous with me. You know that. You’re in charge.” I caress her back to soothe her nerves. “We go at your pace.”
She hesitates, and I feel her heart hammering against me. “There’s something I need to tell you before we…before this goes any further.” Her lashes flutter, and for a second, I think she’ll pull back. But then the words fall out in a rush, so fragile I almost miss them.“I haven’t been with anyone since you.”
The words hit like a wrecking ball. For a second, I don’t breathe. “Since me?”
Her chin dips, unease flickering across her face. “Ten years. I never… I couldn’t…with anyone else. Not with my ex. Not with anyone. You’re the only one I’ve ever slept with.”
The confession shatters something in me. My grip on her tightens instinctively. “Jesus, Maddie…” My voice breaks, low and rough.
Her face twists, misreading me. “You don’t have to say anything.”
“Madeline.” I cut her off, my throat thick. “Do you have any idea what you’ve just told me?”
Her teeth catch her bottom lip, her eyes glistening. I press my forehead to hers, holding her still so she feels me,hears me. “You’ve been mine all this time, even when I didn’t deserve it, and I’ve been yours.” Her breath shudders out, her hand sliding to my cheek like she needs proof. I cradle her face between my palms, forcing her gaze to lock on mine. “It’s. Always. Been. You.”
For a beat, she stares, stunned, not fully believing me, then she pushes back and sits up in a rush, “Are you telling me…”
I nod, confirming her thoughts.
She shakes her head vehemently. “I saw pictures with you and dates. There were ones of you leaving clubs late at night with women draped all over you.”
“And you were engaged,” I remind her, my jaw tight. “It means nothing.”
“You haven’t been with another woman in ten years? Is that what you’re telling me?”
“That’s exactly what I’m telling you.”
“Why?” she blurts out.
I grit my teeth, furious at the thought of being with someone else. “Because I belonged to you, Mads. Still do. Do you honestly think I’d waste ten years trying to claw my way back to you, only to fuck it up with someone else on the side?”
“Never?” she whispers.
“No.” I hesitate, feeling this is the time to be completely open. “There was one time, after Camila died, after you left. I gave up hope, but I couldn’t go through with it. I hated the thought of touching someone who wasn’t you, like I wasbetraying you.” She nods dutifully, rolling her lips to hide a smile. “Does that make you happy, babe?”
Her grin breaks, and then she covers her mouth, wide-eyed. “Oh my god.” Her chest starts to shake, trying to hold in her amusement. “No wonder you’ve been close to blowing in your pants all night.”
I bark out a laugh and pull her back into my chest. “You’re getting punished for that one.”
Then I kiss her, with hunger but more importantly with reverence, tasting every ounce of her confession.
She melts into me, and I feel her surrender.
I can’t wait to worship every inch of her like she deserves.
“Don’t you dare slow down now that you know,” she murmurs, words muffled against my mouth. “I was only nervous because I needed to tell you, but I want everything you promised.”
“Fine by me.” I ease her back onto the bed and crawl down her body. “Now that I know what I do, I’ll have to spend plenty of time warming you up.”
“My favorite part.” She wiggles, her whole body with anticipation, and my gaze drops to the way her breasts wobble in my face.
