“Let’s not use that word loosely. You’re my husband on paper and nothing more, so don’t use that as an excuse.”
He narrows his emerald eyes and rolls his lips, annoyed. Whenever I remind him of this, he gets visibly aggravated.
When we made the drunken mistake of getting married in Vegas, we both had a lot going on and realized what a hassle it would be to get an annulment. So, considering we’ve known each other our whole lives and trust each other implicitly, we agreed to keep it legal, while still keeping it a secret. The deal is, if the time comes when one of us wants to settle down with someone, then we’ll take steps to end it.
“Regardless of that, besides Sadie, you’re the most important person in my life, and I won’t sit around and listen to him disrespect you time and time again. Whether you like me sticking up for you or not… I won’t be sorry for it.”
I stay silent.
There’s no changing his mind.
He needs to learn how to deal with his anger better. The problem is, I’m not sure he knows how, considering he’s never really been an angry person until now.
Trey, my lowlife ex-boyfriend, turned into a raging alcoholic coke addict who can’t keep his mouth shut about me when he’s out on the town, even though he’s the one who cheated and left me.
A blessing; trust me, I know.
He thinks because he has family in high places, he can get away with murder. Unfortunately for him, Jackson couldn’t care less who his family is and somehow is always around him—same pub, same club… wherever it is, Jackson hears all the vile words Trey spews.
I love Jackson for always sticking up for me, he’s done it most of my life, but I don’t want him to fuck uphislife because of it.
He’s also a business owner with a reputation around this city, and I don’t want any of that tarnished because of me. It took a long time for this community to trust some American bloke, so I won’t let him jeopardize that.
Truthfully, I’ve been worried something more has been going on, wondering if Sadie might have mentioned their dad’s messages, but if it were that, I’m sure he would have told me.
Shitty dads are our common ground, and because of it, we’ve been each other’s sounding boards since we were kids—something else I’ll never take for granted.
Jackson’s sister might be my best friend, my “sister soul mate,” as we call one another, but I could never share all the parts of my life with her.
I know now it’s something she notices and might even resent me for, since she has shared every integral part of her life with me.
But even as a young girl, I somehow knew Sadie wasn’t strong enough to handle my issues on top of hers, and if she knew I had more going on than I let on, she would have made it all about me. She would have put herself last, and what Sadie needed was for someone to put her above all else for once. To care for her, as her parents should have.
That’s how Jackson and I found one another, we sought comfort in each other, and to this day, she doesn’t know that Jackson and I have this kindred type of friendship. Only thinking we’re close because we all grew up spending every summer together since she and I were five.
It’s the type of thing that we’ve kept from her for so long that if she found out now, I know my sensitive Sadie would blame herself for not being strong enough to help us both. Let alone navigate her brother’s issues.
Though it’s times like this, his hand in mine, reminding me we’re still married and sticking up for me even if it lands him in jail, that I wish I had my best friend to talk to.
For her to tell me it’s normal that I wish this were all real, that he were truly mine.
While we may be good mates, Jackson and I, it goes beyond that for me.
I’ve secretly been in love with him since I was a teenager.
When we were younger, I thought it was weird that I was crushing on my best friend’s brother. They look so much alike, but where Sadie is softer, giving her that gorgeous girl-next-door look, Jackson was blessed with sexy, defined features.
The chiseled jaw, structured nose, perfect cheekbones, and piercing green eyes. His skin that stretches over his tall, lean but built body is always the perfect color tan.
Despite his best attributes, being together is not in our cards.
Don’t get me wrong. The chemistry is there, like full-on, I-want-to-rip-your-clothes-off-right-this-second chemistry.
But it ends there.
Jackson is a perpetual playboy and always will be.
I have my fun, I go out, and I don’t let defining names stop me from meeting men if I choose. Only for me, it’s to pass the time.
