How fucking stupid of me.
I wasn’t thinking straight then, and when I finally moved on, I felt it was too late to tell Jack. To dredge up all the painful feelings again.
What did I know at seventeen years old?
“I feel like I don’t even know you. You’ve put something between us that I would have never imagined in my whole life. I need to leave. I can’t look at you right now.”
Panic starts to set in. “Please don’t go.”
He whips around. “Tell me, did you mourn our baby?” he yells, tears pouring down his face.
God, he’s so hurt.“Do you think about him at night? Wonder what he would be like?” He points at me with a shaky hand. “You took that from me. Nineteenyears. I had no fucking idea, and now I mourn my child. I don’t care if he was one week or twenty weeks… my child died, and I didn’t fucking know.”
I have no other words, because he’s right to be upset.
“Fuck this.” He storms into our bedroom and aggressively pulls down his luggage, causing half his clothes to fall everywhere.
“You’re leaving me?” I gasp in horror. This can’t be… he can’t leave me.
His eyes narrow and he instinctively takes a step back. I’ve never seen Jackson with such venom in his eyes, especially directed toward me.
“Did I say that, Annabelle? Did I say I was leaving you? I said I was leaving… meaning getting out of this fucking house, because I’m suffocating and I need space.” He throws a random mix of clothes in his luggage and haphazardly tries to close it, but the zipper won’t budge.
“Motherfucker!” He punches the bag, then lifts his eyes, still filled with tears. “You’ve ripped my heart out, Annabelle.”
I bow my head to hide my quivering lip before I speak. I don’t deserve penance, so there is no reason he should see my guilt.
“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you, Jack. I don’t know what else to say. Anything that comes out of my mouth now will sound like an excuse.”
“I’m sorry you didn’t tell me too.” He pauses in front of me and lifts my chin, glaring into my eyes. “Because your unspoken words have caused us the most hurt.”
The pain laced through his words stabs at my heart, and I have no one to blame but myself. My only hope is that somehow he forgives me.
Even though I caused this, it doesn’t mean I’m not just as heartbroken, so I follow after him, and with each step, my sobs get louder.
What if he doesn’t come back?
He swings open the front door, and there stands Sadie and Wills, wide-eyed and motionless.
Fuck.
Jackson
Fuck.
I completely forgot I invited my sister over to clear the air. They must have just got home from their honeymoon.
This is the worst and best timing possible.
Best because I’ll need a ride somewhere, since all I see is red at the moment and I’m in no condition to drive. Worst because I have zero interest in talking about what happened, and I know my hand will be forced.
“What’s going on?” Sadie glances back and forth between our pain-stricken faces.
Belle tries to talk, but chokes on her tears. Everything tells me to turn and hold her, but I can’t.
Not yet.
I turn to Wills. “Can you drive me somewhere?”
