Needing a distraction, I rise to my feet, and glance over at the digital clock on his bedside table.
“Seeing you’re home early, would you like to go with me to Uncle Finn’s, and spend the day with your cousins?”
He nods with a little more energy than before.
“I’ll quickly make some coffee and shower, then we can head off.”
Zac stands and starts picking up the crumpled pieces of paper from the floor, throwing them across the room and into the rubbish bin, with the same skill I saw that day in the park with Kaden. The memory sends a jolt through the pit of my stomach, and I have to shake it off quickly before it takes hold.
My day may have begun in chaos, but I’m determined to end it on a brighter note, surrounded by people who’ve never once let me down—my family.
Chapter 34
Kaden
It’s a Monday evening, and just over twenty-four hours since the truth about me was ripped into the open. Twenty-four hours since Hope cut me off completely like I no longer exist to her. I’ve left voicemails. Sent text after text. Each one has been swallowed by silence.
I haven’t slept much. All I can think about is the look of betrayal and devastation on her face just before the door closed, cutting her from view, an image now etched so deeply into my memory that I know it will haunt me for years.
I had planned to tell her everything that day. The decision was made long before I even reached her house. I knew I couldn’t keep lying to her anymore. I couldn’t keep pretending it didn’t exist. But then Adrian appeared and outed me before I had the chance to ease Hope into the conversation—to soften the blow, though I doubt it would have changed anything.
One look at her face was proof enough: no matter how I approached it, the outcome would have been the same—hershattered trust, her pain, and her decision to want nothing to do with me ever again.
Now here I am, sitting alone in my living room, an unopened bottle of bourbon I got on the way home from work, dangling loosely from my fingers. The television stares back at me, blank and lifeless, a reflection to how I feel in this moment. I let myself sit here, unmoving, until the numbness finally cracks, and when it does, everything hits at once. They tear through me in a violent shockwave as I raise the bottle, my inner demons murmuring words of temptation.
But there’s another voice, softer, whispering at the back of my mind, the one that reminds me how far I’ve come, how much progress I’ve made, and that I can get through this, just like I have before.
My subconscious is at war with itself—two sides fighting for control, each desperate to bend my next move to its will.
Just pop the lid,one voice coaxes smoothly.Let the cool, bitter burn slide down your throat and numb the ache. You deserve the relief.
Don’t,the other cuts in, strained but firm.You’re better than this, Kaden. The buzz is only temporary. The fallout isn’t.
But at least,the first whispers again, softer now,you wouldn’t have to feel anything for a while. Just one sip, that’s all it takes.
My thumb grazes the lid, the urge to twist it open thundering through me.
I close my eyes and force myself to listen.
Name five things you can hear right at this moment.Dr. Carroll’s voice filters through the noise.
...birds chirping just beyond the balcony.
...cars passing on the street below.
...muted voices drifting from somewhere down the hallway.
...the steady vibration of the fridge.
...my heartbeat—loud, and insistent.
The urge loosens its grip but doesn’t fully let go, so I run through the exercise again, this time listing five new sounds to anchor me.
I force myself to focus harder, the moment stretching longer, so long that I don’t even realise I’ve set the bottle down on the coffee table, my attention shifting from what’s in my hand to what’s around me.
Suddenly, a knock at the door breaks my concentration. My eyes fly open, and I’m on my feet in an instant, crossing the room to answer it, the bottle of bourbon already forgotten.
Jason stands just outside my door, worry written across his features, probably replaying our last phone call from earlier today while I was at work.
