"I focused on the feeling. I'm realizing that orgasms are all in the mind. Who knew all along, I was in control of that."
"That's what I've been trying to tell you. It's all about what you allow and what you tolerate. Your body is a puppet and it does whatever your mind tells it to do. However, for women, y'all aren't stimulated that easy. It takes a lot." He spoke.
"Is that why I feel so tired now?"
He nodded. "It is."
Giving the best smile I could muster, my body felt a little weak, now. "I could go for a nap."
"You can't go for another round?" He grinned.
"Absolutely not!"
He put his hands up in mock surrender. "Considering it being your first time cumming, I'll take it easy on you, but when you wake up from your nap, I'm on demon time." At his last statement, he sent a hard slap to my ass before soothing the spot by rubbing over it, after I yelped in pain.
"I hate the sound of that."
"I'm sure you'd love it." He retorted. "Can you walk?"
"I'm sure I can," I murmured followed by a low yawn.
Pulling back from his embrace, I took two steps toward the door and glanced back at him over my shoulder with low eyes now and said, "Ta da," like I'd done a magic trick, getting a beasty chuckle out of him.
"I'm gonna go shower," I said, before turning around to continued trotting.
I couldn't look at him any longer, because those butterflies would start spewing in my stomach again and I wouldn't be able to handle that. Also looking into his eyes would make me feel exposed. If I looked at him right now, with my body still humming from what he'd done to me, and my clit still fluttering from what he'd done to it. My legs were still shaking. Little sparks were shooting up my core with each movement. My juices ran down my thighs and my pussy was still throbbing and swollen, remembering the pressure of his fingers.
That's the part that scared me about all of this, because my body would crave him more after all is said and done. It wasn't supposed to go like this. I'd come here for one thing and was doing another. I was coming here to reclaim some part of myself that Malcolm had destroyed. I hadn't come here to fall apart over a man who did this for a living. The only thing I'd be doing is making shit worse for myself and bruising my feelings.
After I made it to my room and closed the door behind me, I leaned against it for a second, trying to get my breathing under control. Everything was fucked up. I was supposed to be getting stronger and more independent while learning to own my pleasure without needing validation from anyone. That was the whole point of this. Along with, stop tying my worth to whether a man wanted and stop measuring my value by how well I could perform in bed.
Yet, here I am, almost a week in, and I'd just let him finger fuck my pussy like I was his to touch whenever he wanted. It's almost like I belonged to him.
Though I finally scored, I wasn't proud of that, which made me feel some type of way, among all the other shit we talked about. I don't know if Syx noticed it or if he'd ever say anything about it.
I grabbed my pajamas from my suitcase which consisted of cotton shorts from Victoria Secret and a matching tank top. It was nothing sexy, because I needed to put some type of barrier between us, even if it was just thin fabric. Then I trotted toward the bathroom so I could turn the shower water on. Without thinking about it, while standing in front of the shower, waiting for it to heat up, my hand drifted down and slid my fingers across my clit. My stomach caved in. The level of intensity wasn't normal.
My pussy was still wet, swollen and sensitive as hell. My clit was pulsing with its own heartbeat, tender and alive in a way that made my knees weak all over again.
This was different for me because this was what it felt like when someone actually knew what they were doing, when someone paid attention to you and cared enough to learn your body instead of just using it.
I brought my fingers into view and looked at them, slick and glistening. Then I brought them to my nose to smell them. It wasn't to admire my own wetness, but his scent was all over me. It was musky, mixed with sweat, sex and something that belonged to Syx. My pussy smelled like him now, like he'd marked me and made me his. I inhaled again, deeper this time and my body responded like I'd pressed a button. My nipples tightened, core clenched and my pussy began to drench with a pool that ran down my thighs, dripping down my feet, onto the floor. I'd already cum twenty minutes ago.
Syx was becoming addictive. Everything about him was what I wanted in a man. It was his smell, his touch and the way he looked at me like I was the only woman on the planet. The way his voice dropped when he called me "baby" and how his hands knew exactly where to touch, exactly how much pressure and when to push and when to ease off. Syx was making me feel seen too.
That's where the real danger lurked. It wasn't just the orgasms, the sex, or the way my body responded to him. It was the way he looked at me and saw something worth paying attention to. Malcolm never looked at me like that. He never made me feel like my pleasure mattered and my body deserved to be celebrated, but Syx did, and I was falling for it…falling for him.
Shaking away thoughts of Syx, I stepped into the shower and let the hot water rain on my skin, washing away the evidenceof what we'd done. Thoroughly, I cleansed my body, careful not to get my hair damp, then rinsed off before stepping out of the shower to towel dry myself. I'd done my body care ritual after brushing my teeth and flossing, then climbed into bed, so I could take a nap.
I woke up to the smell of pots clanking around in the kitchen. Before stretching, I rubbed my eyes and noticed the sun was starting to go down, touching the horizon and the view was as beautiful as it was a few days ago, damn near making me regret leaving and pondering on staying longer, but I knew I couldn't.
Nosily, I wanted to see what was going on downstairs and what all the clattering was about, because I didn't smell any food cooking. The closer I sauntered to the kitchen, I heard what sounded like giggles and a husky voice coming from a female. My heart felt like it dropped down to my ass and I paused my steps to mosey around without making my presence known. The other day when I eavesdropped on his conversation, the phone wasn't on speaker, but he claimed it was his mother, but this conversation was far from innocent and nothing like a mother/son conversation. I felt the back of my legs get covered in goosebumps from hearing how intimate they sounded.
"I haven't been able to think about anyone but you, Syx. I can't wait to feel that big ass black dick in my pussy. Oh my god! You're the only man who can make me cum! I hate that my pussy can't cooperate without you. What did you do to me?"
I felt my soul fall to the floor pondering his answer or if he'd respond at all to it. Suddenly, my stomach was forming knots.
"'Cuz she know who it belongs to. Quit frontin'." He released a throaty laugh causing her to giggle too.
