The realization makes me feel selfish. Heartless. Like I'm the villain in our story.
But I also know it's honest.
I decide I'll tell him after dev camp. Let him focus on that opportunity without worrying about us. Then when he gets back, I'll tell him about the apartment I hope like hell I get. I cannot be under the same roof with him. It’s clouding both our judgments.
After camp, and with me not sharing a bed with him every night, we’ll be able to figure things out.
Chapter Ten
DECLAN
I'm doing my best to pack my suitcase like an actual adult instead of a teenager heading to sleepaway camp when Sutton walks into my room.
“Hey, babe.”
She gives me a quick kiss. “Hey, yourself.”
"How's the studying going?"
"It's going." She sits at my desk, her reading glasses on top of her head and what’s probably her fourth cup of coffee in hand. "This final is going to destroy me."
"You'll ace it. You always do."
"Maybe."
I glance over at her. The woman looks exhausted.
"You okay?"
"Yeah. Just tired." She finally looks up. "When do you leave again?"
"Tomorrow. We leave for the airport at five.”
"Right. Early."
Something in her tone is off. Flat. Like she's just going through the motions of this conversation.
“Very.”
“Nervous?” she asks.
“Yes. No. I’m not putting any pressure on myself. I’m doing this because two very smart people tell me I need to see if I like it.”
She offers a tired smile. "You'll be great. And it will be fun."
The words are right, but the delivery is wrong. Automatic. Like she's reading from a script.
"Come here," I say.
I sit on the bed and pull her between my legs, hands on her hips.
"You've been quiet lately," I say.
"Just stressed. Finals week."
"Is that all it is?"
"What else would it be?"
