The dream swirls with ashes, smoke, and flames engulfing me.
No! No, don’t leave me!
“She saved me,” I say over and over, collapsing to my knees. “Help her. Help her,” I beg, before everything goes dark.
“No!” I yell, sitting straight up in bed, soaked through my sheets in a cold sweat.
My heart pounds fast and hard, like it’s trying to escape my chest. My face is wet with tears shed in my sleep that I quickly wipe away, and Ellie whimpers beside me as I try to catch my breath. From the other room, the faint wail of a baby crying floats through the walls.Great.I did it again. Another reason that I’m sure they’ll be happier once I’m gone is that I won’t keep accidentally waking up Sunny at all hours of the night and early morning. I don’t feel bad when it happens in the bunk room, and I wake my crew. They get it, but a baby? Being woken up, I look at the clock, at 4:30 am? Yeah, if I were Callie, I’d hate me right about now.
I can’t stop the nightmares. That day plays over and over, not only in my waking thoughts but every night when I close my eyes. When I wake up, I’m not sure what’s worse. At least in my sleep,she’s there. Those last moments with her are all that I have left. I run my hand through my hair and pat Ellie’s head, soothing her.
“I’m okay, girl.”
A tap comes from my door, and my body braces as if for impact. “Come in,” I grumble, my voice still raspy from sleep.
Tom walks in and leans against the wall, placing his hands in his sweatpants as he yawns deeply, clearly being another victim of my yelling.
“Sorry,” I mumble.
“You gonna be alright on your own? I know Callie, and I said your place is ready, but this is your place too untilyou’reready to say otherwise.” He rubs the sleep from his eyes, and Ellie shifts closer to me, silently asking for belly rubs. A convenient distraction from having to look at him and admit I’m not sure what ready is even supposed to look like anymore, but I know that I can’t stay here, disrupting their lives. I’m many things, but doing that would make me a selfish ass.
“Tom, shut up.”
He laughs. “Seriously, man.”
“Yeah, I’m serious too. I’m moving in today, and I’ll be out of your hair by Sunday night at the latest.”
“Tom,” Callie calls from the other room. “Can you get me a fresh sleepsack from the dryer?”
“Daddy-Duty calls.” I nod for him to go tend to her and Sunny before lying back down with hopes of getting a few more hours of sleep in.
Turns out, the duplex doesn’t suck. Newly remodeled, it’s got big windows that let in plenty of sunlight from the front porch. For a one-bedroom ranch, it’s surprisingly spacious, and thekitchen comes fully stocked with brand-new appliances. The movers dropped everything off yesterday, and although Callie definitely went overboard and is refusing to let me pay her back, I must say, it’s nice. She’s got an eye, and even though this is definitely not her style at all, this duplex looks like it was made for me. It’s minimalistic in the best way, with touches of rustic charm that remind me of being back in the mountains of Oregon, living on the river.
She’s had them use river rock as the backsplash, and the color theme spread throughout the space is forest greens and browns. She might have wanted me out, but she did it with a loving hand, and judging by the layout, Tom definitely had a part to play in the remodeling. I’ve even got my own stone fireplace. It’s Memorial Day, so it might be a while before I can use it, but you bet your ass as soon as there’s a cool night, I’m lighting it up. I’m a firefighter who’s obsessed with a goodcontrolledfire. Sue me. The wooden floors feel cool on my feet as I pad across the room, opening the refrigerator to reveal it’s empty. Looks like I’ll need to add grocery shopping to my to-do list.
I haven’t met the neighbor yet. Tom and Callie were pretty tight-lipped about it any time I brought it up, so I’m suspicious, but they’re probably more worried about me making a bad first impression. I noticed a bird feeder outside on their side of the porch, so how bad could they be? It’s probably a little old lady who likes her peace and quiet, which is fine by me. That’s exactly what this place offers. Other than passing by the Cafe every time I need to leave, this place is perfect. It’s secluded up in the Adirondack forest here in Turtle Bay, away from noise and most importantly, other people.
Ellie settles onto the couch, claiming what I’m assuming will now be her spot from now on.
“Try not to eat anything while I’m gone tonight?” I ask her, knowing either way I’m guaranteed to come home and find something destroyed. “I’ll check in on you in the morning, okay?”
I’ve tried to take her into the firehouse again with no luck. I don’t have any options now but to make the drive back and forth to let her out while I’m at the firehouse. When on duty, I have to be there, and that means sleeping in the bunks.
“Is there any chance you could, I don’t know, behave?”
Her head pops up and cocks to the side.
“Why do I feel like that’s a no?”
She lies back down and rolls onto her back before falling asleep instantly.
“Yup, you’re gonna eat the couch.”
Chapter Eight
Tris
Everything hurts. After the cafe shift from hell, I barely make it up the hill to my duplex. My legs feel like they weigh a hundred pounds each as I will them to keep moving forward. I have several different types of jelly splatters on my jeans, and I’m pretty sure there’s a coffee stain down the back of my shirt. This past weekend was exactly as busy as Ainsley promised it would be, and somehow I still wasn’t prepared. Instead of spending Memorial Day celebrating with friends like I have every other year on some expensive yacht off the coast of someone’s private island, I spent the day running around pouring coffee and serving food to customers who always seemed to need one more napkin, straw, or refill. Like seriously?! There’s going to be a path on the floor from all my running back and forth.
