“His little sister, she contacted me the other day.” My sandwich held the eye contact I should have been giving them, but I couldn’t meet their eyes. Not yet. I can’t see their pitying faces or worry lines. I can’t see the two people I’ve grown closest to thinking I am desperate or stupid or wrong.
“How long has it been since you’ve last talked to her?” Luxe asks. I can hear her twiddle with her water bottle. The steel against her fingertips dampens the silence, eating away at my nervous state.
“Five years,” I mutter. I finally meet their eyes. Switching between the two. They remain relaxed, their faces neutral, and I can’t decide if that is worse than pity. It is then when Luxe’s face breaks into a smile, completely throwing me off guard with her next question.
“Is your name really Willow?” Luxe asks jokingly. I want to laugh; I want to be normal. I want to laugh so badly, but I can’t. A sharp, pained laugh comes from me. My skin itches with the need to run and to keep the rest of my story to myself.
“Layla thought I killed him,” I utter, holding the connection of Flora’s hand and Luxe’s eyes as I say the words I’ve found to have hated the most.
“You did tear Cassandra into pieces, literally,” Flora says. She tries to wear a light-hearted expression, but the event still has a hold on her. Flora was kidnapped. Her kidnappers were trying to replace their deceased daughter with Flora Cassandra was themother, and while Iam nota stone-cold killer, I learned my bear definitely is.
Cassandra Bray is the first person I’ve ever killed. Her life is gone because of me. No matter how evil she was, she is dead because of me.
But Flora is safe because I killed Cassandra.
I’mnota bad person.
“I didn’t kill Milo. He was family, not threatening my family.”
“So, this Layla person called to accuse you of killing your soon-to-be mate,” Luxe says, her eyebrows rising as she takes in my situation. “Wow, that’s bold as shit.”
Layla was cold back when she was fifteen. I’m sure twenty-year-old Layla is no different.
“So, what does this mean? Is there something wrong? Is Layla trying to hurt you?” Luxe asks, gripping the sides of the table and cocking her head to the side. She’s getting heated, and a heated female Alpha is not something I wish for Layla to deal with, even if Layla hurt me.
“No, she’s no trouble, I promise. She’s a hurt twenty-year-old missing her brother. She’s coming to visit me soon,” I say, realizing that I have no idea when she’ll be here.
“Is that safe?” Flora asks.
“Maybe we should be there too, in case?” Luxe asks, worry shifting her fingers. Her claws are poking from her fingernails; she’s probably trying to hold her wolf back from making an appearance. I didn’t think she’d be this upset. I didn’t want to... to make her upset. Maybe I shouldn’t have told her that part about Layla? In her anger, will she realize being my friend comes with too much baggage?
“Luxe I’m sorry. I didn’t want to make you upset,” I sputter, trying to figure out how to resolve this. My problems don’t need to be their problems. I should’ve kept this to myself. Now she’llnotice I’m a burden. My breathing becomes more labored as the panic of losing a friend settles in my bones.
“No, Layla is going to be sorry. How dare she talk to you like that?—”
“Pipe down a smidge Luxe, the girl is practically a kid. Is she a threat, Willow?”
“No. I promise,” I say, hoping they take my word for it. Layla isn’t me. She wouldn’t hurt anyone, even someone like me.
“Is that all?” Flora asks. Her hand was probably covered in my sweat, yet she keeps it on my arm. Isn’t she grossed out? She hasn’t even moved her hand to wipe away all the sweat on it. She remains next to me.
Now that I think about it, she’s always done that. She hired me, even when she didn’t have any real positions open, and my resume wasn’t ideal. When she had me organize the first lunch meeting, she asked me to join them. She visits, she calls, she’s here.
This is what friends do, to keep my friends, I’ll do that too. Though I can’t help my eyes shooting to Luxe. She calmed down, her claws retracting into her fingers. Flora squeezes my hand, her eyebrows are raised in question.
I know she’ll drop the conversation if that’s what I wanted to do, and to be honest, I want to. I want to stop here. But I also find myself wanting to spill everything.
I want to tell them my heartbreak over losing Milo doesn’t hurt anymore and how that scares the ever-living shit out of me since he was my mate.
I want to tell them that someone robbed me of a few bras and tea bags yesterday. Tell them how I’ve come to realize how much I’ve missed Layla all these years, and how the idea of her coming to visitmelights my skin with giddiness.
Regardless of my wants, I nod my head, telling her that is all I had to say. She stares at me for a minute before her eyes trailto the clock. I’m emotionally tapped out, and I hope she can tell. I’d hoped she’d take over from here, and the smiling Luxe across the table would understand that I wasn’t as strong as she was. Luxe would have handled all this with assurance, with the grace that comes natural to an Alpha. But I wasn’t an Alpha or a Luna. I need a moment to calm down.
“Enjoy your pizza slice, Luxe. We gotta get back to work,” Flora says, getting up from her chair and collecting her trash.
“Damn, you girlies are leaving me already?” Luxe says with a smile that doesn’t quite reach her eyes.
“Yeah, we have another design meeting to head to,” Flora says, even though we have no meeting lined up right after this. It was open for me to revise Flora’s to-do lists and for Flora to work on her designs. I appreciate what she is doing, though.
