“Hello.” His expression was neutral as he turned to face the wall and stripped off his clothing.
He said nothing else before getting into bed and blowing out all but one candle.
What I would give to know what was going on inside his head. The last time I’d seen him this grumpy was when Scaron let his gaze linger on my body a little too long. I had to sit on Brexl’s lap in order to keep him from getting up and strangling the male.
I padded over to the bed and got under the covers, too. I’d thought of a cover story after dinner as I sat in our- Brexl’s room, alone. I could tell everyone I’d been more affected by Scaron’s kidnapping than even I realized and that I needed some time alone. There were a few empty caves in the mountain that weren’t being used. I could take residence in one of them and pretend to be emotionally healing from my ordeal.
I’d just wait it out until it was no longer awkward for me to not go back to Brexl’s cave. Well, maybe one day I could...no. I couldn’t think that way. There’d be no one day for Brexl and I. He didn’t want a mate, and I needed to accept that.
I should tell him my plan. I turned to face him. He looked magnificent in the dim candlelight. His broad shoulders, offset by his wide chest, and his long brown hair that flowed over the blankets. He was a vision of perfection. What I would give to have him as mine.
I opened my mouth to tell him my plan, but what came out instead surprised me.
“Do you mind if I lay on your chest?”
Maybe it was the fact that our time together was quickly dwindling. Even subconsciously, I could feel the pull of ourimpending departure. I just wanted the comfort of laying on his chest for one more night. One more night of perfection where I could feel comfy and warm and be the one that chased his nightmares away.
“You should not want to.”
Brexl’s answer took me by surprise. Last time I asked this, he was shy but accepting of my offer. This time, he seemed gruff and almost angry.
“But I like touching you, and you deserve to be touched.”
“I don’t know about that,” he said with a huff.
“What do you mean?”
“Just because you befriended a monster doesn’t mean you have to cuddle with one.”
Where was this coming from? Hadn’t we established that he was worth caring for at the beach?
“Is the monster in the room with us?” I teased, trying to lighten the mood.
He, of course, took me literally and replied, “Yes, me. Is that not the reason why you don’t want to be mated to me, because I am a monster?”
All the humor left me, and I sat up to fully face him.
“No! Of course not! Is that what you’ve been thinking this whole time?!
I thought he just didn’t want to be mated. I didn’t realize he thought I saw him as a monster.
“Is that not the truth?” He looked genuinely perplexed and angry.
I ran a hand down my face. “No, Brexl. When we luminesed, I didn’t want to be mated to anyone.”
“Why?” he bit out.
“Because of what I said earlier. Every relationship I’d ever been in, I would somehow lose sight of myself and who I was. It’snot just a bad habit. It’s a real problem, and I didn’t want to do the same thing with you.”
He furrowed his brows as he looked away deep in thought.
“You are not a monster.” My tone was firm.
His gaze snapped back to me and his focus was laser sharp, and angry.
“Iama monster, and you should not want to be with me.”
“Brexl, no your n-”
