“I think he’s got a crush on you.” Hai teased.
“He doesn’t. I can guarantee you that,” I bit out.
“You seemed so taken with him when you first met. What happened?”
“I was taken with him. The first time he brought out that perfectly made walking stick, my heart was a-flutterin’. But since then, he’s been nothing but unfulfilled promises, and I have no idea why. He made Jelly a whole-ass enclosure in one day, and you’re telling me he can’t build me a simple chair? No. Something is off. I know he can build me a chair. He's just refusing to do so.”
Hai nodded and patted me on my shoulder.
“Enough about me. What happened between you and Lumod?” I was over talking about Drovo and ready to switch the subject.
Hai looked down at her bowl and frowned. “I’ve…Well I’ve been thinking about making some changes and instead of talking to Lumod about it, I made up something to fight about and pushed him away.”
“Changes? Is adjusting to a new life on a new planet not enough change for you?” I teased, hoping to lighten the mood.
Hai smiled, but then her expression turned thoughtful. “I want to make some changes that I didn’t feel like I could make back on Earth. There’smore freedom here to be ourselves. The guys have done a good job of creating an open, accepting culture since they all got kicked out of their other home for being different.”
That was true. Despite my fears of not being accepted for my physical limitations, I felt very free to be myself here.
“What changes do you want to make? Anything I can help with?” I wanted Hai to know I supported her, no matter what.
But she stayed silent for a beat and I wondered if she wasn’t comfortable telling me her secret yet.
“I uh…I’ve always felt like I might be genderfluid,” they confessed. “I don’t feel like I firmly fit into the girl category, but I don’t think of myself as a boy either. I feel like I’m a bit of both. My parents would have never understood that so I didn’t act on these feelings. I just played the part of a girl throughout my childhood and lately I’ve been playing the part of a woman, but I’m not a woman, well notjusta woman.”
“Nice!” I was happy for them. Everyone should get to be themselves and express their gender however they wanted to.
“What’s the first change you want to make?”
Hai ran her fingers through her shoulder-length hair and then held up the ends and sighed.
“First, I want to start with a haircut. I’m not ready to change my clothing style just yet. I’m more in thetrying on different gender expressionsphase of all this.”
I nodded my head in understanding. “Didn’t Ashley say she was taking cosmetology classes before she got abducted? Maybe she knows how to cut hair.”
I got up and brushed the dirt off my pants. “Come on, let’s go ask her.” I held out my hand and Hai smiled.
“Thanks Kayla.”
Their expression turned thoughtful, and they added, “don’t tell anyone yet. I don’t want the pressure of having to figure everything out right away. I just want to try different things to see what I do and don’t like for myself.”
“Your secret is safe with me,” I assured her, and I meant it. I wouldn’t tell a soul.
Chapter 2
Drovo
I looked out the small hole in my workshop wall at the rising sun. Vines crept in through the opening in the rock. I allowed them to cover the walls of my workshop. I needed their connection in order to use my abilities to their fullest capacity.
Luna moths perched on my horns while I worked and one landed on the perfectly crafted chair I’d made a month ago. I knew Kayla’s measurements by heart. I didn’t need to measure her again. I just wanted to spend time with her. Priestess help me, but there was no way the goddess could be more beautiful than Kayla. In all my imaginings of the goddess, I never pictured her looking as beautiful as the spirited female with the long red braids and warm brown skin who dominated my dreams every night.
I never had an issue talking with people before, but with Kayla I felt like I was always saying the wrong thing. We’d started off so well, but then as I began to use her mobility device project as an excuse to talk to her, things turned sour. I prolonged the project, drawing it out much longer than it needed to be.
In hindsight, I’m not so sure that was the best decision. It only seemed to make things worse between us, but I was in so deep now that I didn’t know what else to do. For better or worse I’d show Kayla the finished chair portion of the device today.
“Knock, knock,” Kayla said aloud as she stood at the entrance of my cave. The hu-mans had the strange habit of saying the wordsknock, knockaloud instead of actually knocking on the stone wall. We all kept small stones outside our caves to be used to tap on the wall and announce our presence, but the hu-mans rarely used them.
“Is now a good time?” Her powerful voice rang through the air like the beat of a drum one couldn’t help but dance to. Everything was strong about her. Her will, her stubbornness, her smile, her personality, everything but her heart.
