Ryan ended up on his knees beside Phillip's bed.“Love you. God, I love you, Phillip. You have to get better. Ican't do this on my own.”
Sandy felt like a voyeur.
They stayed for the fifteen minutes and Sandytried to get Ryan to move. But he wouldn't. She didn't argue withhim.
***
Mark walked slowly into the room. He had beenelected to get Ryan to eat. The other man didn't look like he’deaten for a long fucking time. “Hey Ryan.” It had been almosttwenty-four hours since Ryan got in. He hadn't left Phillip's side.Not once.
Ryan didn't look up. “I'm not leaving,” hesaid.
“You gotta eat.”
“I'm not fucking leaving.”
“Gawdamnit! Ryan, you want to make yourselfsick, do it on someone else’s watch. Phil is my friend too, and Ifucking die every time I look at him. But he'd be pissed the fuckoff if he knew what you were doing!” Mark snarled.
“Fuck off Mark. You don't know shit...Fuck youall...Fucking laughing...Fucking bastards!” Ryan rose and lookedlike he was heading toward Mark.
“G..otta..eat.” The soft rumble came from behindthem, making both Ryan and Mark jerk back toward the pale figure onthe bed.
“Phil?” Ryan knocked the chair over as he allbut ran for the bedside.
Pale lids shook. Slowly they lifted up overbright, hazel eyes. “Ry..an.” Phillip was having a hard timetalking. His voice was weak and shaky but it was there.
“Oh God! Yes, baby. It's Ryan. Oh God!”
Mark darted out of the room and thumpingfootsteps could be heard coming towards the room.
“You two need to get out!” commanded anurse.
Ryan was about to give the nurse her very own‘fuck’ you when Phillip did the one thing that calmed him instantly- the corner of his lips quirked. It wasn't a smile but it wasclose enough.
Mark pulled Ryan out. “Come on!” He dragged theyounger man out of the ICU and into the waiting room
Everyone could see how agitated Ryan was.
Sherri rose with Gerry beside her.
“He...Oh fuck me! He spoke...opened his eyes,”Ryan sputtered.
A cheer went through the waiting room. Theydidn't care if it pissed anyone off.
“What did he say? Is he...can we go back?”
“He fucking ordered me around,” Ryan said with asputtering laugh. He was crying again but this time it was a goodkind of cry.
***
It seemed that Ryan was the medicine Phillip wasmissing. He slowly began to improve. He wasn't awake for long norwas he a conversationalist, but he would wake up and give them asmall, quirky half-smile. He just lifted the corners of his mouth.But everyone knew what he was doing.
They transferred him to another room. Ryan wouldsleep on the recliner they brought in for him when it was obviousthat he wasn't going anywhere. He spent a few hours each day withhis siblings, who came back down after Ryan came home. He spokewith his friends. Hugged Patrick and spent a long time walking thehalls with the other man. He and Kenneth hung together along withSandy. He called Tory to let her know Alexander was doing fine.
He was currently sitting in Phillip's roomreading ‘Maxium.’
'You're looking at the men, aren't you?” camethe raspy voice.
Ryan looked up and smiled at Phillip. “I am.They all look better than you,” he teased.
