“What if I choose not to slaughter thousands of innocent fae?” I snarl, my hair falling across my face. “What if I’mnotworthy?”
I’m not sure what I expected from my omnipotent, godly father, but laughter wasn’t it. He laughs deeply, then sets down the sword, writhed in green flame, and leans his forearms over his knees.
“Caspian,” he smiles, “I made you. I can unmake you just as easily.”
CHAPTER 11
Ezryn
Ithought I’d miss it more. The helm.
Throughout the centuries of my life, it was a constant reminder of who I was, what I valued. My realm. My honor. No matter where I went, people knew who I was. First, son of Isidora and Thalionor, heir to the Spring throne. Then, the High Prince of Spring himself.
Now, I’m grateful for my anonymity. No one knows my face. With my hair grown long enough to cover my one identifiable feature—the ragged ears, points cut off by my brother’s blade—I could be anyone. A pauper, a merchant.
A member of Kairyn’s army.
I shift in my stolen armor. My brother’s forces consist of goblins gifted from the Below, the deserters from the Queen’s Army, and the Spring soldiers he’s rallied to his side. I’m in a platoon of ex-Queen’s Army soldiers aboard a ship bound for the prison barge. A nameless face, unknown to everyone.
Except her.
I know you.
Even before I removed my helm, it was as if she could see right through me, to the blood and bone and soul beneath. It had felt like we’d known each other our whole lives and were just waiting for the chance to meet. She had loved me in the darkness—and I returned her love with more darkness.
If I am not worthy of basking in her radiance, then I will walk behind her as a shadow. As her shadow, I will engulf any who would dim her light. If darkness is all I have, then I will use it to serve her.
I’d executed my plan over the course of a few days. First, I’d stolen the armor and identification from a soldier undeserving of title or breath. Getting into Hadria was easier than I thought; my brother and I had both served my father in times of battle. Every procedure, security measure, and tactic Kairyn has implemented could have been taken straight from my father’s own war strategies. For anyone else, these would have proved formidable, but I knew each step, each phrase, to get within the city and secure myself a place on a relief ship sailing out to the prison barge. My father would be proud.
Father.I keep my face expressionless, although the thought of who my father once was compared to who he’d been at the end of his life causes my ribs to ache.I could have saved him. I could have made him better—
But thetraitorhad taken that away from me. That spawn of the Below robbed me of my father and helped destroy my rule. I always knew Caspian was incapable of honor.
I thought Kel had finally learned it, too.
Turquoise water splashes up against the porthole. My fellow soldiers and I stand quietly below decks. Long hours have passed. Based on the increased sound of footsteps and shouting above, I surmise we must be getting close to our destination.
I touch the roughly drawn map tucked into the vambrace on my wrist. Yesterday, after I’d found out which ship would be sent to the barge, I snuck into the captain’s quarters and found a map of the prison, the manifest, and a list of ships due in and out. Though there was no mention of Rosalina by name, I’ll be able to find my way to the cell blocks.
If she’s still here,the dark part of my mind whispers.
An hour ago, I’d felt the light in my breasterupt, springing back to life like a desert suddenly awash in a rainstorm.My mate bond.
Whatever they’d been doing to Rosalina, it had stopped. I canfeelher again, distantly, but she’s there beside my heart. Where she belongs.
Are you out there, Rose? I’m coming for you.
Can she hear me? Probably not. Too far away.
Or perhaps my mate bond is damaged. I would not be surprised if I ruined it as I ruined everything else. My mind drifts back to the time at Sylvanita Lake when it had felt like every broken and jagged piece of me was softening. Because of her.
Because she loved me.
The curse laid upon me by the Enchantress had begun to break. With the breaking came a rush of magic I hadn’t felt since my mother passed the Blessing of Spring to me. Magic I have always been too weak to wield. For decades, I dismissed my brother as nothing more than a wild, frenzied child. But I am no better.
Shame rushes over me as I remember what I did to Rosalina. What I did to Spring’s sacred place. I can only imagine what other destruction I would have caused if I had allowed my curse to break.
The wolf controls me. I need him.
