Water pools in my helm, but I kick upward until I’m at the surface, the cold water dripping away from my eyes and mouth. Rosalina floats like a corpse nearby.
“Rose!” I splash over to her.
She’s not breathing.
I can’t think about that. I flip her over, grab her under her arms, and swim on my back to the shore. The sound of my breath and blood rages through my helm.
Finally, I reach the shore and drag her out. Her dress is plastered to her skin and heavy with water. Soaked tendrils of hair stick to her face. I quickly brush them away and put my hand to her mouth.
Nothing.
“No, no, no.” My own chest heaves, and I feel the panic rising. “Rose, wake up. You’ve got to breathe. Come on, Rose.”
I grab her wrist. She’s got a pulse, but it’s weak. Breath. I need to get her breath started. I put my hands on her sternum and push down hard. “Come on, Baby Girl. Breathe for me.” Again and again, I compress her chest. Water streaks down my face, and I don’t know if it’s the lake water or my tears. “Breathe!”
My compressions get harder, and I think I may crack her ribs. She’s still not breathing. I look around the grove, desperate, as if someone might appear. “Help me,” I whimper. “Someone, help me.”
But there’s nothing.
She’sdying! I promised to protect her.
She promised to protect me.
I stop the compressions. A sob escapes me, and I grab her in my arms, clutching her to my chest. She’s so limp. I stare up at the sky and howl. “You can’t do this! You can’t take her from me!”
My hands run through her hair, and I clutch her face. She’s so pale, the life leaving her with every one of my wasted breaths.
My breath.
I can give her my breath.
Every piece of me belonged to her the moment I saw her climbing out of Castletree, anyway.
She was so ungraceful, it’s a wonder I ever suspected she was a spy. Not just ungraceful but unmannered, throwing bread rolls at Kel when we sat together at dinner. And the way she squirmed when I first healed her, nervous as a doe.
And yet … She is fierce. She made bargains with fae, rescued a realm, rescuedus. She laughs with abandon and loves without judgment. She leaves every path she crosses more beautiful.
There is no one more deserving of breath.
And it will be the honor of my life to give her mine.
I lay her back down, then shakily grab the bottom of my helm.
If this works and she awakens, you will have broken your creed,Kairyn sneers in my mind.You will have abandoned everything you’ve ever stood for! You will bring shame to the throne of Spring!
“I know,” I whisper. “And I choose this path, anyway.”
You can’t do this! Ezryn, stop!
I lift the helm off my head and drop it to the side.
The air makes my wet cheeks cold, and a breeze plays at the ends of my hair. It’s been so long since I’ve bared my face in nature and not only in the privacy of my chambers.
“I seek no forgiveness, nor ask for understanding,” I whisper to the wind, to my people, to the ancient fae of Spring. “This is my will, my choice. I offer Rosalina O’Connell the breath of life.”
I lean down and place my lips against hers.
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