“I keep telling myself ‘what if this’, ‘what if that’, but that’s just me being anxious about hypothetical crap that can’t happen because we’ve already crossed those bridges. What if the girls find out? What if Drew is a complete asshole about the whole situation? What if I fall for you? All of that has already happened and all I’m left with is what is.
“I’m glad the girls have you. They love you. You make them happy. They trust you as a friend and a responsible adult. And I—I have fallen for you so hard.” Sloan couldn’t bring herself to say the words. She didn’t know what jerk had told all of humankind that there was some sort of time limit on love, that there was a ninety-day review with matters of the heart, but she couldn’t help how she felt. She was falling in love with Rafe and she did not want him to go. Maybe it was selfish, but it was how she felt.
“Then that’s enough for me. How can I help with the Drew situation?” Rafe asked.
“Just help me keep things normal for the girls, their routine and everything. Not that I think you would, but don’t shit-talk him in front of them. I want them to process their own feelings how they need to. I don’t want to pile on.”
“Done. Is there anything I could do for you?”
“Tonight? No. I’ve set the proper dogs on him. I’m going to talk to my lawyer about stripping his custody rights and maybe getting a restraining order. I need to hydrate and sleep. As much fun as I had today, I still need to do my job, bright and early tomorrow morning.”
“Well, I’m going to go clean out the girls’ overnight bags and throw in some laundry. And then I might go for a ride. I need some air.”
“Okay.”
“Come here.” Rafe stood and pulled Sloan into his arms. He hugged her for a long time before letting her go. She went up to her room to take a shower and when she got out, there was a text from Rafe.
I’ll be back.
She replied even though she had a feeling he wouldn’t read it right away.She could hear his bike’s engine revving in the driveway.
Ride safe.
A half hour or so later, Rafe still wasn’t back. Sloan was fading. She knew she should go to sleep, but part of her wanted to make sure Rafe got home okay.She lay in the dark, staring blankly at another episode ofGolden Girls, in the middle of her freshly washed sheets. The scent of his sunscreen and the sex they’d had were long gone. Her friends were still at it, lighting up the group chat, but she still felt too raw to have a group conversation about what had gone down.
Her phone started vibrating on her nightstand. She figured it was Xeni, checking in and ready to dish about how her mom and her aunts had driven her up the wall. She looked at the screen and wasn’t entirely sure she wasn’t the one who had been hexed.
She hit accept.
“Guessing you made it back to SEA-TAC okay. What do you want?”
“I just want to know if it’s true,” Drew said in that shit-eating tone. Sloan knew what was coming next, but she was too tired to run from it.
“If what’s true?”
“Are you fucking him?”
“Does it matter? Whether you believe me or not, you took whatever you thought out on our kids.”
“I was fucking shocked. Can you blame me?”
“Yeah, I can. You’re a fucking adult, Drew. I have no idea why you can’t act like it. What if you had punched him? What if you had broken your hand? Then what?”
“If you had a six-year-old tell you I was fucking someone else, you’d be pissed too.”
Sloan scoffed, remembering the day Dara Lindsey had been waiting for her in the hospital parking garage. How she’d saved texts and emails and pictures. A lot of pictures. Sloan had thanked her, calmly driven home and ended her marriage. The girls were young, but old enough to understand what bad shouting meant and how much it scared them. They’d only heard their dad raise his voice.
“Actually, no. I wouldn’t because we aren’t together anymore and I don’t give a damn about what you do with your personal time.”
“So the answer is yes.” Drew let out a disgusted laugh. “That bad boy with a bike and tats crap is your thing now? Decided to go slumming? Teach me a lesson?”
“I’m not doing this with you. I refuse. You’re not going to turn me into that woman who has a man in her life who can’t control himself. You’ve pissed me off for the last time, Drew. You’ve betrayed my trust and now I’m afraid of what you might do if you don’t get your way. I don’t think you know how unchill that is. You can be upset that the girls don’t want to live with you, but you cannot assault someone because you think they’ve taken your place.”
“I don’t give a shit—” he started to shout, but then he stopped himself. Sloan closed her eyes. He’d almost let one of the most horrible things he’d ever said to her in his life slip again. The one thing that had given her the custody agreement they had now. He didn’t give a shit about the girls. Sloan thought things had changed once they were born. He’d tried to be a good father to them. Gave them everything, bragged about them, but Sloan knew deep down inside, he never wanted them.
In his mind, they were the one thing that would convince Sloan to give up her career and give him back the title of the best surgeon in Seattle. But that panned out differently, hadn’t it? He didn’t want the girls to move in with him. He wanted to use them to drag Sloan back to Seattle. Too bad that shit was just not going to happen.
“I get it,” Sloan said, swallowing down her emotions. “Your issue is with me and even if I thought for one second that you had the right to be jealous, you screwed up by taking it out on Addison and Avery. You don’t have the right to my heart anymore.”
