If we match, I’ll do my best to shoulder therest.
Didn’t mean to rhyme, but it’s too late to changeit.
Short, sweet, nothing offensive or misogynistic. She flipped through all of his pictures. Everything seemed in order there too. No pictures of him holding an assault rifle or posing with young girls in foreign countries, and yes, that was definitely a pattern she’d seen on dating apps and it creeped her the fuckout.
“Okay, you’ve been looking at his profile for like fiveminutes?
“Lemme see,” Meeganasked.
“No!” Erica reached over and gently peeled the phone out of Shae’s hand. “Let’s make a decision first. Then we swipe. Then we hand off the phone. When the swipe is up for consideration like this, you can’t make any sudden movements or you might miss theswipe.”
“I’m friends with him on Facebook,” Shae said. “I can always message him if we lose theswipe.”
“Just let me handle this.Okay?”
“You’re the master,” Shae said, putting her hands up in surrender. “Pleaseproceed.”
“Okay. So you know him. You’ve been around him a little. You’ve talked a time ortwo.”
“Yeah, we worked together for a while. He was kinda quiet, really nice though. Super polite. He always made sure to thank me personally whenever I brought in dessert. I think he was dessert deprived though, so it might have just been the sugar going to his head. He was very professional, which couldn’t be said about a lot of the guysthere.”
“Okay, so he passes that not-shittytest.”
“Yes.”
“Would you go out withhim?”
“Truthfully, yes. Look how hot heis!”
“Hey, you’re no slouch,” Sarahsaid.
“Yeah, Shae. You're sexy,” Meegan said with a wink and she knew Meegan meant it. She often commented on Shae’ssexiness.
“I say swipe. At the very least, sleep with him. If he turns out to be a social dud, you can politely step aside and wish him the best,” Ericasaid.
“Or ghost on him,” Meegan said with a grunt and a thrust of herhips.
“Uh, ghosting doesn’t involve any motions of the pelvis,” Shaereplied.
“Make this your Christmas wish.” Joanna held her hands up and started praying out loud in her low monotone voice. “Dear Santa and his badass wife, Mrs. Claus. Please let the super hot guy from Shae’s old job sweep her off her feet and give her the dicking of a lifetime, just in time for Christmas. In Frosty’s name, amen.” She dropped her hands and looked back over at Shae. “That should do thetrick.’”
“Well, I guess you have to swipe on him now. Joanna blessed our union, just in time forChristmas.”
“Okay. I’mswiping.”
Shae glanced at the TV as April-Jane tripped and fell as she was walking with Chad toward their helicopter date. There was some giggling and talk of how she was afraid of heights, even from five feet off theground.
“Uuuuummmmm…” Erica nudged herarm.
“What?” Shae looked back down at her phone. At first she didn’t believe what she was seeing. Her face in a heart. Aidan’s face in a heart and little sparking flames bouncing aroundthem.
You have a newmatch.
Shae grabbed the phone from Erica’s hand. “Oh shit. What do Ido?”
“What? What happened?” Keiraasked.
“We matched.” Shae held up the phone so her cousin could see. Her heart was thumping. It was all so stupid. She was actually excited over something that would most certainly turn out to be nothing in the next thirtyseconds.
