He put a finger over her lips. “I just wanted to tell you how I feel. I certainly couldn’t hide it anymore. I was about to burst. My heart’s in your hands, sweetheart.”
His declaration made her almost giddy. His love was a wonderful and precious gift. She wanted to hold it close like a beautiful, fragile butterfly.
But how could this ever work? They lived in different states. She had a job awaiting her in Boston, and he was destined to stay here and run Pinehaven. He wasmadefor this place.
Did he expect her to give up her dreams? To forfeit the job she’d worked so hard for? “Jonah... I won’t be here forever. I have a life in Boston.”
“I know. I get that. But I thought you had a right to know how I feel. And if there’s any possibility you could feel the same way eventually... Well, I guess we’ll have some things to work out.”
Eventually? Judging by the way her heart pummeled the walls of her chest, she felt that waynow.Which begged the question: How had this happened? They were supposed to be having fun! There was nothing fun about the fear flooding her veins.
“Hey... listen, it’s gonna be okay. I didn’t tell you that to worry you. That’s the last thing I wanted. We’ll work this out.”
In her experience things didn’t usually work out in her favor. But no, that was her childhood speaking. She was in charge of her life now, not some well-meaning caseworker. She wouldn’t let anything bad happen. Although she seemed to have let herself fall in love. Was that a bad thing? It kind of seemed like it.
“Have a little faith, honey. It’s barely August. Let’s just see how it goes.” He smiled gently as he cupped her cheek. “If you want that, too, that is.”
She should probably tell him how she felt about him. Own up to the fear that roiled in her gut. But the words seemed to be lodged in her throat. “Sure. Let’s just see how it goes.”
He kissed her then, so softly and reverently she couldn’t imagine anything more breathtaking. But the worry coursing through her took control. How would this ever work out? And what would become of her when it all came to a crashing halt?
***
Had Jonah thought he was in love with Monica last year? Ha. His emotions hadn’t come close to the overwhelming, consuming feelings of love and devotion he had for Lauren. He couldn’t be with her enough. Couldn’t kiss her enough. Or touch her enough.
His grades had fallen off a bit this summer, and he couldn’t even bring himself to care. What did his GPA matter when compared to time with the woman he wanted to spend the rest of his life with? Because it was becoming apparent that Lauren was the only woman for him.
In the couple weeks since his declaration, they’d continued working together and exploring the area on her days off. They’d gone out to dinner a few times, the mood inevitably turning romantic, serious.
She still hadn’t returned his proclamation. It didn’t surprise him that she was hesitant to voice her feelings. But she didn’t have to say the words—her feelings were obvious in every lingering gaze, every affectionate touch.
But even while he sensed her feelings for him had grown exponentially, he also detected her trepidation. And who could blame her? It was hard laying your heart on the line when the future was so ambiguous. Hard enough for him with the whole Monica fiasco in his past, much less for someone like Lauren whose past was rife with uncertainty.
She might be the strongest, most capable woman he’d ever known, but she wasn’t without her vulnerabilities. He hurt for all the horrible things she’d been through as a child. He wanted to make it up to her somehow. To love her better. To help her see how much she deserved to be adored. He wanted to give her the stability she’d never had along with the freedom to chart her own course.
Ultimately, it was that line of thinking that made him realize what he had to do. So on her day off, exactly two weeks after his profession of love, he invited her to his apartment for dinner. He wasn’t much of a cook, but he cobbled together a meal: a simple salad, grilled steak, and baked potatoes with all the toppings.
They ate at the small table on his balcony as daylight waned and shadows lengthened. He’d lit the only candle he could find and used the cloth napkins his mom had given him as a housewarming gift. The balcony faced the town park, but if you craned your neck a bit, you could see the evening sun shimmering on the lake’s surface.
Lauren complimented his grilling skills and said it was the fluffiest potato she’d had in ages. Conversation flowed well as it always did between the two of them.
But as the meal wound down he became nervous about the upcoming conversation. What if he’d read her wrong? What if she wasn’t in the same place he was emotionally? Would his offer be perceived as too much, too soon? What if he only pushed her away?
“...and then the frog leaped on her head and she ate it.”
The lengthy silence clued him in. He shook away his heavy thoughts and replayed her words in his head.“What?”
She chuckled. “So you are listening. You had that blank look—plus you’ve just about pulverized that potato skin.”
He glanced down. So he had. He pushed back the plate. “Sorry. Guess I’m a little nervous.”
“Oh yeah?” She arched a brow. “What’s up?”
He loved when she arched that brow. It made her look so saucy.Focus, Landry.This is too important to screw up.He gathered his courage and broached the subject. “I’d like to circle back to the conversation we had on the boat a couple weeks ago.”
She froze for a fraction of a second. And then that saucy expression was back. “Yes, we should definitely resume our debate about whether or not white chocolate isrealchocolate.”
“That’s not up for debate. I clearly won that argument.”
