He pushed his hands into his pockets. “It was nothing you did. I just...”
She might not know what had happened, but she knew what the problem was. It was the very thing she’d feared when she decided to risk her heart anyway. “You don’t want to settle down here with me.”
His eyes softened. His posture lost that starched look. “It’s not you. It’s nothing to do with you. I can’t settle down. It’s just not in me, that’s all.”
He was choosing his vagabond lifestyle over her. It meant more to him than she did. That was hard to swallow because nothing meant more to her than him. And she was getting really tired of being everyone’s second choice.
“I’ll stay through the end of the month like we agreed.”
She blinked at him. And work together for eleven more days? See him and not be able to touch him? Talk to him and not be able to hold him or laugh with him or kiss him silly? She was already shaking her head. “No. That won’t work.”
“At the very least you’ll need time to find some help. And there’s Trail Days this weekend. I’ll do my part.”
“I’ll figure it out. I can’t do this. Work together and just act like—” Her voice wavered pitifully. She pressed her lips together.
“I’ll stay out of your way. Come on, I don’t want to leave you in a bind.”
In a bind?Didn’t he know he was ripping her heart from her chest? Leaving her short-staffed was the least of what he was doing to her. He was abandoning her, and she didn’t want him hanging around, watching her fall apart. She didn’t even know if she could hold it together long enough to see him off today.
She pressed through the pain. Pushed back the tears. Swallowed the lump in her throat. “Thank you for telling me how you feel. But I think it’s better if you just leave now. I’ll make out a final check—”
“Charlie...”
“—and forward it to your new address, or I can drop it by your place later, whichever you prefer.”
He tilted his head. Resignation showed in the downward tilt of his eyes and the slump of his shoulders. “I’ll leave if that’s what you really want. Keep the money though. It’s the least I can do, leaving you in the lurch.” Their gazes lingered for a long, painful moment. “I want you to know this isn’t easy for me either. I wish...”
She waited for him to finish. Hoped for something that would ease the terrible ache building inside. Crushing her.
Gunner shook his head.
That was all she was getting. The thought of running the ranch without him seemed so empty now. So lonely. The thought of losing him made her legs tremble under her weight. It took all her will to straighten her spine, lift her lips into some semblance of a smile. “All right then. I guess this is goodbye.”
The shutters over his eyes pulled back, allowing her a glimpse of his pain. “I’m really sorry, Charlotte. I never meant for this to happen.”
Charlotte.
Her formal name had never felt like such a slap in the face. “Good luck to you, Gunner.” She turned to leave just in time. The tears she’d held back burst like water from a breached dam. Still, feeling his hot gaze on her, she kept her posture erect, her strides confident as she headed toward the house.
Forty
It was the longest day in history. Every hour, every minute passed with the growing realization that Charlotte had lost Gunner for good. That she was running the ranch on her own. She couldn’t think past today. The burden of now was heavy enough on its own.
All was quiet on the Robinson front. But she wouldn’t kid herself. Gavin had told them all by now, and they were undoubtedly angry and disgusted with her. She couldn’t even blame them.
It was well after dark when she did the night check. She took a few extra minutes with Midnight. He’d bonded so well with Gunner. She would’ve eased the transition had she seen this coming. She reached out slowly and stroked his face, comforted that he let her touch him at least.
“It’s all right, boy. You’ll be okay without him. You’ll see.”
Her feet were heavy and sluggish as she headed back to the house. Her stomach gave a rumble. She’d forgotten to eat lunch. Had tried to stay busy to stave off thoughts of Gunner. It hadn’t worked.
She should eat something. She headed into the empty house, wishing Emerson were around so the place wasn’t so quiet. She scooped out some homemade mac ’n’ cheese and put it in the microwave. Midway through the cycle a knock sounded at the door.
Her pulse shot into overdrive. Had Gunner changed his mind? She gave her traitorous heart a stern rebuke. More likely it was the Robinson clan come to tell her off. She’d sent Lisa an email this afternoon, canceling the Join-Up demonstration Gunner was supposed to do at Trail Days. She hadn’t heard back.
Her legs wobbled as she headed for the door. With sweaty palms she reached for the handle and pulled it open. She’d been partly right. Just past the screen door, Cooper stood under the glow of the porch light, still wearing his sheriff’s uniform. His grim expression made Charlotte’s heart bottom out.
What did you say to someone who’d just found out he was your brother after months of—how had Gavin put it?—ingratiating yourself into his family? She settled for a simple “Hi.”
