Chapter 9
This is dangerous. Olivia nearly laughed aloud at the thought, considering everything she’d been through. Nevertheless, it was true. Being this close to Jakewasdangerous, yet she couldn’t find the strength to resist.
When he opened his arms and offered to hold her...how could she turn that down? In her mind, she knew it was stupid, but her body had moved right on over, as if it was the most wonderful idea in the world.
Her hand rested against the hard Kevlar covering his shirt. She didn’t need to feel each ripple of his six pack to know they were there, but it was his beating heart that grabbed her attention more. Even through the protective vest, it pounded hard and fast against her cheek, nearly matching the rhythm of her own.
Olivia wondered if their somewhat intimate embrace was making him uncomfortable. He’d asked her to come to him, but only to help keep her warm.
Needing to say something so Jake wouldn’t feel so awkward, Olivia spoke against his chest. “Thank you.”
“No need to thank me. Can’t have you coming back to life with a cold, now, can we?” he teased.
She almost smiled. “I meant for all of it.” She worked hard to keep her voice from cracking, but in the end it didn’t work. At least their position hid her face from his. “I don’t know what would have happened if you hadn’t been there today.” That last sentence came out as little more than a whisper.
Jake kissed the top of her head, the gesture small and simple, but Olivia felt it straight to her heart. He rested his cheek against her hair, and a part of her hated how wonderful it felt.
“I’m so sorry, Olivia,” Jake’s emotional words vibrated against her cheek. “All I ever wanted to do was protect you. I promised Mike I’d always watch out for you, and this fucking happens.” He kissed her head again. “I swear to God, if I had known you were still alive, I would have been down here in a heartbeat. I hope you know that, sweetheart.”
Sweetheart.He’d called her that a few times, now. Olivia knew he was just being kind, but that didn’t keep her heart from tripping over itself each time she heard it.
Unable to stop herself, she raised her head, her breath catching when her eyes found his. They were the most intense, heart-stirring eyes she’d ever seen. Right now, those eyes were also pain-riddled and...wet?
Impossible.Jake wasn’t a crier. The man was as tough as they came. Yet, there was something there Olivia had never seen before.
His face blurred behind her own unshed tears. “I prayed for you to come,” she whispered. “Never doubted that you would. Not until they showed me that paper.” A tear fell down her cheek, but Olivia ignored it. Jake didn’t.
He gently brushed it away. “I’m so sorry I wasn’t there for you,” he apologized again.
Without thinking, Olivia moved her hand up to cup his face. Her palm found his cheek, the rough whiskers tickling the pads of her fingers. “You’re here, now, Jake. That’s all that matters.”
Jake’s eyes stayed on hers for a moment before finding her mouth. The space between his eyebrows bunched together, and Olivia wished like crazy that she could read his mind.
Despite her earlier convictions, all she could think of was how she wanted him closer. How, even though she knew it was wrong, she still longed for his touch. And how, in this moment, she needed him to kiss her more than she needed to breathe.
****
He needed to pull away. As much as Jake wanted to lean down and take what he’d always wanted, he knew he should put some distance between them. Olivia needed to rest, and he needed to let her.
Which was exactly what he had intended to do, until he made the mistake of glancing down. That perfect, tempting mouth was so close. Just a couple inches lower, and he’d finally be able to taste her. But this was neither the time nor the place. He needed to do right by Olivia, and pull the fuck back.
Except, when his eyes found hers again, she didn’t look as though she wanted him to pull back. She was in his arms, staring up at him as if she wanted nothing more than for him to kiss her.
Sonofabitch.Why was doing the right thing so hard? He was former Delta, for Christ’s sake. He should have more control over his hormones than this.
Decision made, Jake had just started to move away, when Olivia’s chin lifted up toward him. Her mouth was so close, he could feel her warm breath as it caressed his face.
Suddenly, it no longer mattered that he’d been Special Ops, or that he and his team practiced super self-control on a regular basis. When the tip of her tongue darted out and she whispered his name...
He. Was. Lost.
“Liv,” he whispered back as he leaned in, lightly brushing his lips against hers.
Jake half-expected her to pull back and slug him. Instead—thank Christ—her hand slid from his cheek around to the back of his neck. Using it as leverage, she moved higher, closer. Until she was almost sitting in his lap.
Kissing Olivia could be a colossal mistake on the grandest of scales, but he was already committed to it. Jake had waited a long damn time for this, and by God, he was going to take what he could while he had the chance.
