Whatever was wrong with him wasn’t physical. It was mental. I wracked my brains, trying to piece together my limited knowledge. I didn’t have a good solution, and I wasn’t even sure what this was. Some form of panic attack?
“Can I touch you?” I asked, pressing my fingers more firmly against his bent knees.
“That’s…nice.”
Encouraged, I rubbed small circles with my thumbs. My presence seemed to comfort him. I debated humming an old lullaby Francesca sang to us when we were little. Our nanny always knew what to do to make things better. But I didn’t know if that would come off as demeaning.
So I started talking. “Storm had an accident in the house today.”
Liam’s breathing didn’t change. It was like he gasped for each breath and couldn’t push out the air once it was trapped in his lungs.
“It was my fault really. He whined, but I was in the middle of a really good scene,” I explained as I moved my hands down his thighs and back up. “The stalker was, um, doing things to her.”
My cheeks flamed at the memory. This probably wasn’t the best story to be telling him.
Liam’s voice was hollow. “What was he doing?”
I wet my lips, wishing I could take the words back. But my beast wanted to know.
“He used a gun to….” I gulped. “He used a gun to pleasure her.”
Finally, Liam took a deep breath. “That’s a good part.”
“Oh!” I squeaked. “You read that?”
“Yeah,” he rasped. “I’ve finished the bleeding story and need part two. I was going to pick it up for us but wanted to ask if you’d like to go back to Target tomorrow.”
There was a self-deprecating note to his words. It was as if he thought he didn’t deserve to spend time with me. If that was really what he was thinking, I needed to change his mind.
I plucked his hand, loving that he didn’t wear the glove, and clasped it in mine. “I would like that.”
Liam tried to pull away, but I held him tightly.
“Zade wouldn’t have PTSD from an explosion,” he muttered ruthlessly. “That man is unstoppable.”
“Real people aren’t invincible,” I countered.
“We should be.”
While his trembling had stopped and he was able to draw a proper breath to speak, this mental spiral wasn’t much better.
“We should be human.”
One by one, Liam stretched out his legs. “How can you accept me if I can’t protect you?”
“Um, when have you ever not protected me?” I asked hotly. “You’ve taken care of me, provided for me, and you guard me like a treasure. That’s not nothing, Liam.”
With a harsh huff of disgust, he tried to stand.
I did the only thing I could. I climbed on his legs, weighing down those tree trunk thighs.
“Listen to me,” I snapped, placing a hand on either side of his face. “I don’t like you because you’re flawless. So you have episodes. Big deal! Those are scars you wear on the inside. You’re not the only one who’s gone through some shit. There are plenty of treatments for this. We can work on it, okay?”
Through the gloom, I felt his gaze rake down my face. I wet my lips and leaned forward.
“Why would you waste your time on someone as damaged as me?” he whispered. “I’m hideous.”
A crack split through my chest. He needed me. If I ran, if I left him, he would blame it on being broken, which couldn’t be further from the truth.
