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The room feels too quiet.
Too still.
Too full of things I’m not saying.
“I don’t know what this is,” I admit.
And that right there?
That’s the truth.
The one I’ve been avoiding.
The one I didn’t want to name.
Didn’t want to feel.
Didn’t want to—
need.
“But I know it’s not just the mission.”
My voice shakes now.
Just slightly.
Enough to feel it.
“Because I’ve been in bad situations before.”
Worse than this.
Harder than this.
Colder than this.
“And I’ve never…”
I stop.
Because I can’t say it.
Not fully.
Not out loud.
I lean closer.
Rest my forehead lightly against his hand.
Close my eyes.
Just for a second.
“I’ve never been afraid like that,” I whisper.
There it is.
