“So, what? You were gonna wait until you gave birth and just show up at my doorstep with a baby?”
“No.”
“Then what was your plan, Dai? Help me understand how shit was that fucked up with us that you would do some shit like this.”
“It wasn’t intentional. I found out after I moved. I didn’t know how to tell you.”
“You start by picking up the phone,” I said flatly.
“It wasn’t that simple. I was still hurting, Pryce,” she snapped at me.
“Oh, this is another one of those times where your hurt is supposed to outweigh mine and give you a get out of jail free card cause you didn’t know how to regulate your feelings? Yeah, that shit ain’t gon’ fly with this. You deadass wrong.”
“I’m sorry.” Her hand went to her belly, and I shook my head.
“This shit crazy,” I expressed, running my hands down my face. “I don’t even know what else to say to you right now, so I think it’s best we call it a night.” I cut the conversation because I was afraid that I wouldn’t be able to come back from what I would say next.
“Okay.” She turned and started to walk to the door.
“Where you going?”
“You said we’re calling it a night.”
“Yeah. I’m not going nowhere until we get an understanding. You can go upstairs, and I’ll be right here for us to have that conversation once the sun comes up.”
“Pryce, I don’t think…”
“Let me do the thinking this time. It’s your not thinking that got us here in the first place. I’ll see you in the morning.”
She stared at me with a look that said she wanted to say so much but sucked it up.
“I’m not sleeping upstairs. I was on the couch.”
“Whatever.” I walked away from her and into the living room that was still set up the way I remembered it.
I watched as she went over to the couch and laid down. She made sure to lay with her back facing me. The way I was feeling, I’d rather her not look at me. She’d do that enough once we had our conversation in a few hours.
I stayedup the rest of the night watching Dai sleep. The whole time, the number six kept repeating over and over again in my mind. The woman I’d spent four years loving had let six months cast a dark cloud over my head. Six months of missed appointments. Six months of changes to her body as she created life that I’d missed. Six fuckin’ months. My jaw tightened again thinking about it.
I didn’t know if I was madder that she’d left me in the dark or if it was because I felt like her reasoning for doing so was lame as fuck. Either way, Dai had tried me. The sun came up, and light broke through the curtains, shining directly on her. She shifted on the couch, and her hand slid down to her belly. Without my permission, something in my chest pulled tight watching the gesture of love and protection. I could feel relief creeping up under my anger. Not to replace it but to remind me that this was what I ultimately wanted — Adai back home.
I felt the urge to talk to the baby, so I got up and walked over to the couch. Lowering myself down to the floor, close enoughto her belly, I leaned over with my forearms rested on my knees and introduced myself.
“Wassup?” I said quietly. “This Pryce, ya cool ass daddy. I know this ya first time hearing my voice, and you probably in there like, ‘who is this nigga?’.” I chuckled a little. “Part of that is ya mama fault for her bad decision making.” I paused and glanced up at Adai, who appeared to be still sleep, then turned back to the baby. “Her bad decision don’t make her a bad person though. She’s actually dope as hell. Funny. Charismatic. Fine as hell. Oh, and let’s not forget emotional. I probably have more tears to look forward to now that you’re on the way. But it’s cool. You hold it down when you love somebody like I love ya mommy. As for me, they say ya pops mean, so you might have that little edge too but fuck it. You don’t need nobody but us anyway.”
Adai shifted, and I looked up to see her eyes open. They were filled with emotion and too heavy to start off the morning. I didn’t want to speak yet, so we just stared at each other. We’d always been able to communicate silently what we couldn’t or refused to put into words during a heated moment. This was no different.
In my head, she was all kinds of sneaky ass, selfish ass bitches, words I’d never say to her out loud, but I knew my face conveyed them. We spent so much time reading each other during the relationship that sometimes we skipped speaking altogether. Sometimes, it worked; other times, it was a dangerous place to be.
Her eyes glanced down at where I sat, probably wondering why I was so close, then back up to my face. There was anger between us, hurt and confusion. I also saw a hint of relief on her face. Pushing myself up, I stood, and she sat up on the couch at the same time.
“Make an appointment with your doctor here asap.”
Her brows pulled together. “Huh?”
“I wanna see my baby. I wanna know how he or she is doing. You know the gender?” I asked, hoping she at least held onto that moment for me.
Blinking once, she shook her head. “No. I don’t know yet. I wanted to wait for you.”
