Ben nods, grabbing my hand and dragging me out the door.
Once outside, I let out a little chuckle as he leads me to his car. None of what he said inside was funny, not before he dropped to his knees or after, but I laugh anyways.
Ben has a way of making me feel alive. Happy. Excited. Desired. I have no idea how I’m going to live without those feelings once I go back to my old life.
“Did you enjoy that?” he asks, flashing me a smile. He unlocks his car, opening the door for me. I slide in, flashing him a grin.
“Yes. I enjoyed that very much.”
“I’m glad,” he says, shutting the door.
When he climbs into the driver’s seat, starting the car, I can’t help the big smile plastered on my face. The plan doesn’t change. I still need to push him away, but it’s nice to know Ben Parker is willing to do pretty much anything for me.
TWENTY-FOUR
Prue eyesme as I drive. I can feel her staring but can’t bring myself to look her way.
It’s not lost on me that I literally fell to my knees for her. If it was only in front of strangers that would be one thing, but I did it in front of Aaron, my friend and bandmate. That changes everything. There is no way he doesn’t run and tell the others.
I have lost my fucking mind.
They are used to me pulling stupid shit, but never like this. I’ve never lost my cool over a girl before. My ability to be rational when it comes to Prue is non-existent apparently, and now she knows it.
“I’m sorry,” she finally says.
I didn’t expect an apology. She knew what she was doing. Her intention was to push my buttons. I can’t blame her for her behavior these last few days. She is going through a lot and I’m more than willing to take whatever she dishes. In fact, I’m growing to like it.
I should’ve handled myself better. Losing my cool wasn’t okay. I should’ve kept myself together, for her sake, and not taken the bait. It’s just the idea of her being with him triggers me in ways I can’t explain.
I’m trying to tell myself it’s all about her being safe, but deep down I know there is another layer to it. I don’t want her to be with him because he isn’t me. That part fucking scares me.
“For what exactly?”
“Making you mad.”
“Was it not your intention to upset me?”
“No,” she whispers.
“Don’t lie,” I reply playfully, so she sees I’m not upset with her. “You might be able to lie well to others, but I see right through it.”
“Okay, so I was trying to push your buttons, but you didn’t need to fly off the handle like that,” she snaps back.
“You’re right,” I say, glancing over at her. Her mouth drops open, as she processes what I just said. “I’m sorry, Prue. Losing my cool like that wasn’t very nice of me. It wasn’t my place to say that stuff in the company of others. I’m truly sorry, which I hope I made very clear when I was on my knees, begging for your forgiveness.”
“You did a pretty good job.” She scoffs. “Though it didn’t need to be so vulgar.”
“Didn’t it?” I flash her a cocky smile.
“Not in public.” She sighs. “I think I’m losing my mind.”
“You don’t say?” I laugh.
She pushes at my arm, and I grip the wheel tighter, sucking in a labored breath that I hope she doesn’t notice. The sudden movement makes my side ache.
“Really, Ben. What the hell am I doing?”
“Processing. It’s going to take time to become someone new, Prue. Time and effort. It doesn’t happen overnight. The strugglebetween staying with what you know and changing is hard. Learning to live with the pain takes time. Trust me, I know. But you’ll get there.”
