“I won’t give up on us, even if you have. I refuse to ever give up on you. This is not how we end because our story doesn’t have an ending, little butterfly. You’re stuck with me until the end of time.”
And then he disappears, leaving me surrounded by sticky notes covered in quotes from fictional novels about unforgettable love.
This is so unlike the Dominik I know. The side that cares and tries so hard to convince me of…what? Even if I felt the same, even if I wanted to try, my brother would never allow it. He would make this impossible for us. It’s just not in the cards.
When I finally stand, I move the sticky notes aside to find copies ofThe Great Gatsby,Romeo and Juliet,Tess of the d’Urbervilles, andThe Hunchback of Notre Dame. I want to roll my eyes, throw the books against the wall, and curse him. What’s the point of all of this?
There is no version of reality where Dominik and I will get a happy ending. There is too much standing in our way and too much pain from the past.
I collect all the sticky notes and books, locate an empty box in my closet, and toss them inside. Out of sight, out of mind.
As long as I stick to the original plan, everything will be okay.
Just stick to the plan, Zoe.
Stick to the plan,I repeat over and over again, trying to ignore the fluttering in my chest.
8
DOMINIK
“Is she coming, man? We have to get going soon.” Our assistant coach is pacing, glaring at his watch every two seconds and just about ready to ream me out.
I messed up again. The pilots need to take off in less than ten minutes, and my woman isn’t here yet. Knowing Zoe, she’s doing this on purpose to make me sweat.
I really want to pull up the tracker app and check on her whereabouts. But after everything that went down in my closet, I made a crucial choice to rid myself of all the toxic behaviors that hurt Zoe. If I truly want to regain her trust, it’s important she learns to come to me on her own terms. Even if I do refuse to leave, I need her to count on me.
I want to start fresh. Show her I’m capable of change.
As I glance down at my phone, I notice my last text to Zoe. It contains all the information about our flight for today, including the location and details. This is the first time she’s joining me for an away game, and unfortunately, we have done no preparation beforehand. Now she’ll be stuck in a plane with me and my teammates for hours.
Maybe she decided to bail on me today because the last time I saw her, I laid my heart bare on her bedroom floor only forher to look at me as if I had lost my fucking mind. And maybe I have. But I needed her to understand the effect she has on me. How she consumes my thoughts incessantly, how I ache for her constantly. I know a part of her desires me. It’s there, even if she has buried it somewhere deep inside. I felt it in the way she kissed me in the stairwell. It’s the same desire from the masquerade ball when she didn’t know me, but it’s even more charged.
If I have to pursue her until she confronts her emotions, then I will go to the ends of the earth to do so. The line between us is blurry right now. I delved into many books to convince her that our love story is eternal, similar to the timeless classics found in romance novels. Regardless of how much time passes, or the obstacles in our way, we will always gravitate toward each other, forever intertwined. This bond will endure in this universe and every alternate one that exists, forever orbiting one another.
Everything is heightened for me.
The other night, I left her room as if I were on fire. Needing to get out of there before I said those dreaded three words. The words I know she doesn’t want to hear, and even if I said them, she wouldn’t have believed me. I don’t even know if this is love. Maybe it’s just a form of insanity and I’ve painted it the same color as love to justify my words and actions. Or maybe I’ve always loved Zoe.
Maybe she is the only one I have ever loved, and that scares me more than anything else.
Fuck.
After running my hand through my hair for what feels like the eightieth time, I finally turn around to face the charter flight, aware that everyone is waiting for me.
She’s not coming.
Rolling my shoulders back, I sigh in defeat as I begin making my way toward the plane’s staircase. They’re all going to ask mewhy she bailed after I covered everything, and I have no idea what I’m going to tell them. I’m sick of lying. Sick of hiding from everyone.
Why isn’t Zoe coming, Dom? Oh, thanks for asking, team. Because I’m a piece of shit who lied to her, used her, and doesn’t deserve her forgiveness or her time.
The bitter chill of the February wind assaults me mercilessly as I make my way up the rattling, metal staircase. Just as I reach the halfway point, I hear a car screech from behind, making me almost lose my footing when I turn back.
The pure relief and joy I feel watching Zoe step out of the yellow taxi cab is indescribable. Her golden hair whips around in the wind, creating a breathtaking sight. I don’t even feel the cold anymore as I take her in.
She’s here. She showed up for me.
My heart lurches up into my throat as I watch her gather her things, looking all shades of flustered and so fucking cute that it sends a shot of adrenaline through my veins. Like she’s a drug I just hit up for the first time. It feels as if she ignites a spark within me, spreading warmth and intensity throughout my body. No one else has ever made me feel like Zoe does just by simply existing.
