By the time you read this, I’ll probably be gone. I promise to come back soon to get my things. I wasn’t quite sure howto say goodbye after everything that’s happened, and maybe writing it down is easier for me than saying it out loud.
I spoke with Rebeca. I told her the truth about the manuscript leak. It was the least I could do after all these years of silence.
I suppose neither of us has been entirely fair in this story. We clung to something that no longer existed and hurt each other in the process.
I don’t know if you ever knew how much I loved you, or how much I also loved the version of us that existed when we were friends. But I think now we both need to walk away so we can find each other again.
I’ve accepted that job in London. Maybe starting over is the only thing that makes sense at this point.
As for you…
Take advantage of this new opportunity.
Don’t let it slip away again.”
Martina slowly lowers the paper. The silence in the bedroom becomes almost suffocating. For a few seconds she remains motionless, staring at the note as if the words might change if she looks at them long enough. Her heart is pounding against her ribs.
“It can’t be…” The words slip from her lips. “No, it can’t be.”
She presses her lips together tightly. Her head starts spinning. Julia has spoken to Rebeca. She’s told her everything. The truth that had been buried for six years, rotting in silence. The weight of that revelation falls on her, and she feels a suddendizziness, a mixture of relief, anger, and fear that churns her stomach. How dare Julia decide for her, especially now? How dare she set them both free with a cold note and a ticket to London?
Just then the doorbell rings. The sound shatters the stillness of the apartment with unexpected clarity, and Martina jumps. For a second, she doesn’t move a millimeter. The doorbell rings again, insistently. She leaves the note on the dresser and walks toward the door. Every step seems filled with a tension she can’t explain, as if the floor had become unstable beneath her feet.
But when she opens the door and finds Rebeca standing there, all the pain disappears. Rebeca is holding a bag in each hand, and her expression is calm. Almost radiant, with a gentleness in her eyes that Martina hasn’t seen in years.
“I ordered Chinese food,” she says, holding up the bags with a shy smile that doesn’t quite hide her nervousness. “Do you want some?”
Martina looks at her. Their eyes meet, and something inside Martina calms down, as if that gaze could release everything her heart holds.
A smile appears on her face before she can stop it, small and trembling.
“Sure,” she replies, and Martina steps away from the door. “Come in.”
Rebeca enters the apartment. The aroma of food fills the living room as they set the containers on the coffee table. Martina turns on a small lamp that casts a warm, golden light over the space, softening the shadows. For a few minutes,they both move in silence, arranging the plates, opening the cardboard containers, placing the chopsticks next to the boxes.
Rebeca opens a bottle of beer and pours two glasses. Finally, she sits on the floor, facing the table, with her legs crossed. Martina does the same, sitting across from her, so close that she can catch the faint scent of her perfume.
The silence lingers for a few more seconds, and then Rebeca speaks, looking into her eyes with an intensity that makes the air feel almost vibrating.
“Julia told me everything,” she says, and the words come out quickly, almost hastily, as if she’d been holding them back for hours. Even though Martina already knows the news, she lets her continue. “The truth is, I don’t know what to say. Six years have passed, and I feel like the only thing I did was make the mistake of not listening to you. Of not believing you when I needed to most.”
She pauses, lowering her gaze for a moment before raising it again.
“Because you knew what happened. Right?”
Martina presses her lips together and shrugs slightly.
“It was the editor-in-chief,” she admits before letting out a sigh. “The competition offered him a lot of money, and I suppose he took advantage of my goodwill. At that time, the competing publishing house was negotiating a contract with the author who ended up at yours. The war between the two companies was brutal, but they kept it very secret until everything blew up.”
Rebeca frowns slightly, but doesn’t interrupt her. Martina takes a breath before continuing, her fingers idly fiddling with the chopsticks holding her Chinese food.
“What I know is that the rival publisher paid him to leak information about the manuscript you were working on. By the time I realized what he’d done… it was already too late. And everyone needed to find someone to blame for not having played their cards right, for that secrecy that sometimes surrounds a novel.”
Martina pauses for a moment and swallows hard.
“I thought it would only hurt you if I told you then, that you deserved to find your own way without carrying that burden, even if you didn’t know the whole truth.”
Rebeca doesn’t take her eyes off her. Her eyes shine as she recalls the pain she went through at that moment. But also with an understanding she doesn’t intend to hide.
