“How do you think it made me feel seeing you with someone else?” Her voice cracked slightly, and the sound caught me off guard. I moved towards her, and in an instant the mood shifted. She linked her arms around my waist, and I held her head against me.
“I told you, it isn’t like that. Mei’s my friend.”
I softly arched her head back and looked into her eyes, now swirling pools of insecurity.
Francesca’s sudden fragility was a new foothold.
“It’s you I’m fucking, isn’t it?” I grinned, daring to echo her words.
The words seemed to stoke a fire. Francesca stood and gripped my wrists as she smothered my mouth with ravenous kisses. With frantic hands, we peeled away clothes until there was nothing between us but heat and breath.
19
EVER FALLEN IN LOVE
In the spirit of openness, I made a few half-hearted offers to introduce Francesca to Mei. She always declined with a curled lip, and quiet relief coursed through me. I imagined it would’ve been like introducing a cat to a mouse and hoping all would end well.
My friendship with Mei had given my confidence a boost, and in some small way it seemed to have redressed the power balance between Francesca and me. She complained about it, but having to compete for my attention made her thirstier for it, as if a bite of jealousy made her hungrier for me.
Once again, I returned from my lecture to find her ensconced in my room, mum’s blanket draped around her shoulders, and my bunny slippers on her feet. She was munching biscuits on my bed and flicking through a copy ofNME. As always, my heart squeezed at the sight of her, but I held my breath, waiting for the other boot to drop.
“I still don’t know why you choose to hang out with that foreign student when you could be spending time with me,” she said, not looking up.
I shucked off my coat and forced a levity I wasn’t feeling into my voice. “Her name is Mei,and you’re welcome to join us anytime.”
She peered over her magazine. “And you’d introduce me as what — yourgirlfriend?”
“My neighbour…my friend,” I said quickly. “You’re my friend. And that’s fine. I know you’re not comfortable with people knowing about us… yet.” I paused, letting the last word land, but she didn’t react to it, which I took as promising. “I thought you had plans anyway?”
Francesca sighed and flipped the page. “Jeremy’s working on his dissertation, or something equally dull. I didn’t fancy spending the afternoon in the library watching you flirt withher, so I came back here.”
I ignored the jab because it was better that way. “Don’t you have an assignment due?”
“I got an extension.”
I crawled up the bed, wriggling between her legs until I was able to duck my head under the magazine and peer up at her.
“What are you doing?” she huffed as if I were an unwelcome distraction.
“Giving you some attention.” I jutted my bottom lip in a mock pout and said in a baby voice, “You obviously got lonely without me around. You’re even wearing my bunnies that you so love to mock.”
“Oh, shut up!” The corners of her mouth twitched with a grin.
A soft moment stretched between us. I rested my head on her chest, enjoying the warmth of her, and realising that I was actually too tired to start anything. She lazily stroked her fingers through my hair.
“Do you fancy catching the train into the city tomorrow? We could go shopping. Jeremy took me to this little Italian place by the canal; we could go there for lunch after. My treat.”
I tried not to bristle at the mention of time she’d spent alone with Jeremy; it had been my choice to take a step back after all. They’d probably have included me otherwise.Probably.
“I can’t tomorrow. I’ve got a lecture in the morning, then Mei and I are?—”
“Seriously?” She stiffened underneath me. “You’re choosing to spend your free time withher?”
The bedsprings creaked as I kneeled up between her knees. “You’ve only just suggested something. I’d already made plans.”
“And you’re choosing not to unmake them for me.”
Tension spiked in the air between us.
