“And it’s been how long since you let yourself have a proper relationship?”
Catherine opened her mouth to respond.
“I’m not talking about flirting with internet weirdos or having fuck-buddies.” Penny gestured with her fork.
“Fork-buddies?”
Penny narrowed her eyes. “I see you, Catherine Truscote.”
As much as Catherine didn’t want to believe that her emotional growth had been stunted by a love affair that expired over three decades ago, Penny’s theory made sense. She’d spent her entire professional life helping other people fight their demons but had never raised the courage to confront her own. She’d turned her space into a fortress and wrapped her routine around herself like a thick layer of bubble wrap; nothing could penetrate it — not even joy.
Penny placed a warm hand over Catherine’s cold one and peered into her face. “Love can only grow in the soil of vulnerability.”
Catherine frowned. “Did you just quote Brené Brown at me?”
Penny gasped with mock offence. “How dare you! I made that up. But I do love Brené with all my heart. Maybe you need to see a therapist?”
“I am a therapist.”
“All the more reason you of all people should know it’d be good to talk to someonequalified!”
“Who needs qualified?” Catherine grinned. “You’ve just sat there like Bargain Brené with your glossy-magazine psychology and managed to unpack over three decades of my bullshit in a single breath.”
Penny shimmied her shoulders and fluttered her eyelashes. “Penny Weiss, lawyer and life-coach.”
“Yeah, yeah. Don’t get carried away.”
Something shifted in the weighty pause that settled between them.
“Not that it changes anything now, but I tried, you know,” said Penny.
“Tried what?”
“Tried to get you to open up when we were…”
“Fucking.” Catherine finished the sentence quietly before Penny did.
“You’re so sexy when you swear.”
“I know,” Catherine smirked.
“Things might’ve been different between us, is what I’m saying. But I needed more than you were able to give at the time… and then there was Lawrence.”
“Lovely Lawrence.”
“He is rather.” Penny nodded in agreement.
“Well, at least it wasn’t because I’m unlovable.”
Penny leaned across and cupped Catherine’s face in her hands. “Far from it. You’re wonderful. And who knows what might come along if you open yourself up.”
“Maybe, just maybe… it’ll be a lovely little kitten who cracks open my withered old heart.”
Penny smooshed Catherine’s cheeks together, and laughter bounced between them.
16
BLACKMAIL
