“No.” Straightening my shoulders, I set my mug of wine aside and brace for the inevitable. “I can do this.”
I won’t run. I’m a part of this group of friends, and whether he brought me into the fold or not, I don’t intend to lose them just because Gabe and I are uncomfortable around each other. A moment later, they come into view. Jase spots us first and stops short, swearing. Devon nearly runs into the back of him, and Gabe steps to the side to avoid them. Unfortunately, this gives him a clear line of sight to me.
He freezes, and I can instantly see that he hasn’t been doing any better than I have. His eyes are bloodshot, his jaw is scruffy and unshaven, and he’s recently cut his hair, which is cropped close to his skull.
“Syd,” he breathes.
“Oh, fuck,” Devon groans, grabbing his arm and trying to tug him away, but Gabe is bigger and doesn’t budge. My heart lurches at the sight of him, and he looks so tortured that I ache to run my hand over his stubbly jaw and assure him everything will be okay. But everything isn’t okay, and I can’t mess with his head like that when I know things aren’t right between us, so I stay where I am and pretend I’m glued to the sofa.
“Bro, come on,” Jase says, shoving his arm. “Let’s go watch those videos.”
“Not yet,” he replies, taking a step toward me. “Sydney, baby, can we talk in private?”
Pressing my lips together, I shake my head. If he gets me alone, all of my resolve will sail out the window.
“Okay, then.” He cracks his neck from side to side and sucks in air. “I’ll say this in front of everyone.”
Uh-oh.I have a sinking feeling I may have made the wrong decision. Heat crawls up my cheeks. What does he think he’s doing?
He drops to his knees, and behind him, Devon claps a hand over his eyes. I want to do the same. Whatever he’s about to say, I just know it’s going to make things ten times harder.
“I love you, Sydney. I’m hooked on you. My heart is all yours, and I’m not giving up on you. I’ll even pull out of my big fight if you want, but I’m not letting you go without making sure you know exactly how much you mean to me.” His expression is gut-wrenchingly sincere, and I can’t believe he’s doing this. He’s splaying himself out in front of everyone. Making himself vulnerable. But that doesn’t change the fact that all he’s giving me are words. I need to see actions to back those up, so I can believe in our future.
“Gabe, no. Don’t do this,” I plead. “Not right now. Give it time, and we can talk about things. But you need your head to be in the ring, and I need space. I told you that.”
His gaze drops from mine to the floor, becoming blank, and I hate it. Ihatethat I’m doing this to him. But I need to look out for me, and he needs to respect my boundaries.
“I’m not giving up on you.” His voice is quiet but strong, and it rolls over me like velvet. “I’ll prove how much I care.”
And then he stands and allows his friends to guide him away.
“You’re fucking crazy,” I hear Devon tell him as they pass into another room.
I shake my head, hardly able to believe what just happened.
“That was intense,” Lena murmurs.
“Yeah.” I grab my purse and stand. “I’m going to go.”
She leaps to her feet. “Don’t let him chase you out. I’ll make sure Jase keeps him away.”
“No, it’s okay. I’m just shaken up. I need to be on my own.”
I head for the door and she joins me. “Call if you need to, okay? I’m here for you whenever.”
“Thanks, Lee.” I kiss her cheek. “Wish him luck for me, if I don’t see him before the fight.”
“I will.”
A while later, I’m home, but it takes many more hours before my nerves settle enough to have any peace.
Gabe
A little over a week later, the day of my fight against Leo Delaney arrives, and I have a decision to make. Ever since I saw Sydney at Jase’s place last Friday, I’ve been trying to get in touch with her. Calling, texting, knocking on her door—although God knows if she was there or not because I don’t have a copy of her schedule. Hell, I even sent an email, and all I’ve received in response is crickets.
Today, I’m not letting her brush me off or avoid me. I’m not afraid of hard work, and I have plenty of patience—just ask anyone at the gym. I’m going to use those qualities to take the next step with Sydney. I want her in my life. In order to be whole, Ineedher, and I’ve never gone down without a fight so there’s no reason to start now. But first, it’s time I have a heart to heart with my father.
I eat a big breakfast, then organize my gear bag for the evening, double checking that my mouthguard and groin cup are accounted for. I shower, change into comfortable track pants, a sleeveless shirt, and a hoodie, then pack enough sandwiches and snacks to feed an army. Finally, I strap the bag onto my motorcycle and ride it to Mama and Dad’s place. I already know Mama is away because I bought a salon voucher for her and one of her friends. I’m also reasonably sure Dad will be there, reviewing past fights and searching for any last-minute advice he can share with me. That’s how he is. He supports me, and he wants the best for me. And that’s why, even though this is going to be hard, I know that, in the end, he’ll understand.
