I’m forced to acknowledge that my physical need is real. It’s pent up within me and I have no easy release for it.
The first time the keeper left me wanting, I did something about it myself, a move that brought him right back to me.
But this time…
There’s a part of me that knows it’shimI want and nothing else will be enough.
I want my enemy.
But I can’t have him.
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
Iglide from the bedroom into the hallway and, once more, it’s as if the cottage could be empty.
I pause at the entrance to the room with the table and the fireplace, but Emil isn’t there any longer.
With a strike of sudden unease, I’m reminded of the moments back on the island when he and I immersed ourselves in the ocean to wash sand off our bodies.
Within the water, Emil’s form had been like a dark shadow, so much more like the wraith he’d been when I’d first met him.
The moonlight had streamed through his entire form, halting only when it had reached the ring on his finger.
In that moment, it had seemed as if he hadn’t existed at all.
Now, he’s like that all the time.
I don’t understand what’s changed or when, exactly, it happened.
Was it during his fight with my father within the catacombs or after my heart started breaking?
Or even when I broke the book?
Only a little of my anger has gone and none of my physical need, but now worry joins it.
I may have tried to wrest back control, but the reality is that I have none.
With a shiver, I hurry from the cottage into the rose garden, pausing when the apple orchard catches my eye.
The way it sparkles, it’s pretty, but not in a nice way. More in a pretty-thing-that-will-bite-you way. I haven’t gone near it yet, and I’m not sure if I should.
Turning away from it, I hurry back to my pack, the gauzy, black dress swishing around my legs along the way.
They’re all curled up around the campfire except for Riot, who’s standing watch.
He greets me softly, but there’s an urgency in his gaze as he looks me over—probably checking me for injuries. “Darkness, are you okay?”
“He didn’t tell me anything.”
Riot doesn’t look surprised. “At least you tried.”
“Yeah.” I pause where I stand, not wanting to wake the others, but also uncertain if I’ll be able to sleep.
When I glance at Riot, he’s wearing a sad smile.
“It doesn’t take a genius to know that you’ve got a lot on your mind,” he says. “You could try running it off. This forest is deep, and if you head in that direction, you’ll avoid Jonah.” He points toward the west. “That is, assuming you want to be alone? If you’d like company, I’m happy to come with you.”
The corners of his mouth rise. “Panther versus wolf could be interesting.”
