"So, tell me about him." We’ve been roaming the streets in Montana for the last hour, and I’m internally thanking my past self for choosing to opt for comfortable shoes. It’s almost like I knew the type of day she had planned required a lot of walking.
Akira, however, is probably hating herself for her decision to wear heels rather than sneakers. She knew the stakes and chose wrong anyway.
"Who?" I ask casually, focusing on the windows we pass, looking for something to catch my attention and distract me from whatever is about to come.
"You really going to make me say his name?" She asks, shoveling a tiny scoop of gelato into her mouth, licking her lips after she swallows. "You seem to forget that I had a small role to play in all of this. Iwasthere the night of the auction, remember? I even raised your paddle for you."
"What do you want to know?"I give in.
"Why him and not…"
"You?" I finish the sentence for her, and we stop in the middle of the walkway, passersby grunting when they’re forced to walk around us. "Why him and not you?"
She shakes her head. "No, you idiot. You and I happened months ago, and I knew then it was a one-time thing. But the impression I got was that you weren’t ever looking to date, so I didn’t bother trying to pursue you in that way. I knew Josie had plans for you and Avery, but when I found out online that you had gottenmarried—thank you for telling me, by the way—I had this feeling in the pit of my stomach. Like, sure, I knew it was fake, but on some level, I knew it was different. And a huge, embarrassing part of me wondered what you saw in him that you never saw in me." She loops her arm through mine. "Then I had to remind myself that you had no choice in the matter. You probably see him the way the rest of the world does."
I sit with her words longer than I expected to, but they hit me right in the chest.
When I met Akira, she and I hit it off instantly. But I looked up to her and viewed her more like a colleague and a friend than anything else. Once the mini tour had finished, we celebrated with her crew and hooked up. It was a one-time thing, I knew it then, and I know it now. But I never once told her I was looking for love, or that I ever wanted it. So, for her to come to thatconclusion alone makes me wonder about the type of person I portray myself to be in front of the people closest to me.
"I guess it’s just one of those things, you know? I never really knew how badly I wanted this career until Josie said the label was willing to take it away from me. It’s not like I wasn’t given a choice. Hell, it was my idea to fly to Vegas and elope. He planned with Lizzie and Jenna for them to be there without my knowledge."
She watches me closely, searching for something—I don’t know what.
But she’s one of the few who knows this isn’t real. And she’s not throwing it in my face or telling me I’m making a mistake.
"Do you see him the same way the rest of the world does?" This time, it’s a question, and not her stating what she thought was a fact.
"He doesn’t treat me the way he treats the rest of the world. He doesn’t even treat the world how they say he does. So, no. I don’t." I sigh when someone accidentally walks into my shoulder, but I keep my attention on Akira.
"How does he treat you?"
Like I’m important, and brave.
Like what I want matters.
LikeImatter, singer or not.
"Better than anybody I’ve ever been in a fake marriage with."
That gets a snicker out of her. One that brings a real laugh out of me, too.
Out of everybody close to me, she knowsthislife. She knows how to manage it, how to live with it.
"So, was your big plan for us to roam the streets in disguises all day before the show starts tonight?" I ask her. She accepts the change of topic with a smile on her face, her green eyes lightening with the sun.
"No," she admits, shaking her head, grin still evident. Pulling her phone out of her pocket, she checks the time, then looks at me. "Okay, now it’s ready. We can go." She pulls a blindfold out of her pocket and uses it to cover my eyes.
"What are you doing?"
She places her hand on my lower back, guiding me toward what I now know is a car sitting idle on the side of the road.
"Do you trust me?"
No.
"Yes." It comes out more like a croak than anything respectable, and she giggles next to my ear.
"I can tell when you’re lying, Olive, but I’ll keep pretending that I can’t to make you feel better."
