It’s been exactly one year since I decided that there would be no going back. And I meant it. Exactly one year since I told her she was it for me and that I was all in.The last year has been a chaotic downpour of emotions, taking the good with the bad, and I don’t think I would change any of it.
Do I have a relationship with Max Anderson? No. He has attempted to connect with me, but he’s no longer someone I admire or look up to. Austin hasn’t bothered to reach out, either. Not even to apologize after our confrontation.
His son, Milo, was born just after Christmas, but I don’t know if they have any sort of relationship. I heard through the rumor mill (thanks, Mrs. Bishop), that he’s been to rehab and therapy for his anger issues, though, so I guess that’s better than nothing.
My mom wanted me to press charges, and I’d considered it, but I realized there was no point. The damage was already done. I didn’t want to go through months of court over something that would be my word against his. There’s not a chance in hell that he would ever verbally admit to anyone what he did.
It took my mom and I a little while to get back to where we used to be, too. Our relationship is almost back to where it was, albeit a little strained. I don’t know if I’ll ever understand why she went about it the way she did, but she did the best she could. She was all that I had for a long time, and I couldn’t lose her.
All the fucked up shit in my life lead me right to this moment, with this girl in front of me. I may be about to do something in the most unconventional way, I just hope she loves it all the same.
"Now can you tell me where we’re going?” she asks one last time, and finally, I take off her blindfold as we stand in the kitchen of our brand new home, together, for the first time. "Harley. Wow—” she says as she glides her hands over one of the marble countertops. "This is beautiful.” Her voice is low, and I nod in agreement, smiling at her while she takes in the beauty of our home, and I take in the beauty of all that she is.
"I thought we could celebrate tonight. Maybe have a party with all of our closest friends and family,” I say with a shrug, keeping my voice casual.
"But I don’t have time to plan anything, Harley.” She drops her purse to the ground at her feet, pulling her phone out of the back pocket of her dark jeans frantically, hoping to contact local suppliers for rush orders.
Everything has already been taken care of, but she doesn't know that.
"Herring.” I chuckle, hoping to get her attention, but she ignores, pacing the room, phone to her ear, waiting for the person on the other end of the line to answer her call.
"Come on, come on, pick up.”
"Herring,” I repeat, my words going straight over her head as she hangs up and attempts to call someone else.
"I can’t believe you would spring this on me at the last minute, Harley. I amtheparty planner in Grangewood. If people are attending my party, everything has to be perfect. Come on, pick up the damn phone!”
"Cassandra!” I first name her to get her attention, and it worked.
"Hang up the phone.”
"Why?”
"Just, hang up. Please.” Finally, she closes her eyes, deep breaths through her nose and out of her mouth. Greeting me with a soft smile, she places her phone down on the counter top. "No one is going to answer your calls today, Cassandra,” I say, confusion wiping her frustrated expression clean off her face. I only call her by her first name when conversation is important, and this is about to be the most important one we've ever had.
Bridging the gap between us, I take her hand in mine as she stares at me, wide-eyed. "What are you doing?” she whispers, her bottom lip trembles.
"I know you never want to be engaged again,” I begin, but my impatient girl cuts me off.
"No, I would happily be—”
"Let me finish, Herring,” I urge her, raising my eyebrow as I place a kiss on the back of her hand. "I know you never want to be engaged again, which really fucking sucks, because I want to marry you.” I pause, waiting for some kind of interjection, but she doesn't say a word. I can tell it’s taking everything in her power to be silent."I want nothing more than to marry you, but when you kept tellingeveryoneyou never wanted to beengagedagain, I had to think of a…loophole.”
Silence, still.
"In our room upstairs is a box that has a ring in it, made to live on your left ring finger, but the issue is that it’s an engagement ring.” I give a lopsided smile, watching as she throws her head back, rapidly blinking her tears away, throat bobbing from the lump she’s swallowed. Slowly bringing her hazel eyes back to mine, I continue. "Next to the engagement ring sits it's matching wedding band. Because I don’tjustwant you to wear the engagement ring, I want you to wear both. I don’tjustwant you to be my fiancé, I want you to be mywife, and I would love nothing more than to be your husband.” Wiping the tears away from her cheeks, she nods frantically, but I’m still not finished.
"I’m not asking you to marry me so we can be engaged and get marriedeventually, because while I do want to marry you, I want to do ittoday. I want to be able to tell everybody that you're my wife and I want that to start today.So, if it’s okay with you, Jenna is waiting upstairs in our new bedroom. She has her team with her to do your hair and makeup exactly how you want it.” I take a deep, steady breath, watching her tears as they freely fall.
"After that, she’ll help you put on your custom-made wedding dress that we’ve had tailored to fit you perfectly. Once you’re ready, Hank will be waiting at the bottom of the stairs to walk you down the aisle to meet me. Does that sound like something you might want to do?” She’s silent for a beat, so I quickly interject with a second option.
"Or we can be engaged for as long as you want if you’re not ready to get married today, and we can use today as an engagement party. There’s a dress upstairs for both options.”
"I’ve never wanted to do anything more in my life,” she finally says, leaning in for a soft kiss before turning on her heels to head for the stairs.
"How did you pull this off?” she asks over her shoulder.
"I had a lot of help. Oh, maybe try to write some vows while you’re getting ready.” I wink before heading to our backyard, where everything is set up and ready to go.
