“Where the fuck is that asshole?” my dad growled into the phone.
King sighed heavily on the other end of the line. “He’s in Rosewood. I’m on my way there now.” The phone was quiet, and then I heard my brother ask, “Why didn’t you tell me I had a fucking sister?”
“Because I didn’t want her involved in this shit, and it’s not like you ever want to talk to me for longer than two seconds without telling me what an asshole I am.”
“Yeah, ’cause you’re father of the fucking year, right?”
“King,” a woman’s voice hissed. “Sal?”
“Yeah, honey?” My father’s shoulders slumped when the woman spoke.
“We’ll talk about this when we get there.”
“We’ll see you soon, Grace.”
He disconnected the call and turned. “Grace is coming too?” I asked.
I hadn’t met Grace; there was no reason I would. I’d never been to Nebraska. Never thought much about King and the others until Devlyn spilled the beans unknowingly.
“Yeah, you’ll like her.” My father smiled, and I felt a pang of jealousy.
“Daddy, I don’t want you to hurt him.”
“Baby, he left you pregnant and alone. That’s not okay.”
“That’s what you did,” I snapped.
“Morgan,” my mother scolded.
“No, Mom,” I began, turning to face her. “That’s exactly what he did. He left us to keep us safe. He kept me a secret my entire life with the notion that I wouldn’t get hurt. Then he found out I had a brother, and he kept it from me.”
“Is that why he didn’t come back to you? To keep you safe?” my father barked. “I never fuckin’ left. I was here for every important moment in your life.” He looked at me with hurt in his eyes. “The ones you told me about, anyway.”
“Low blow, Sal,” Mac clipped.
“I don’t know why Jude never came home. I wouldn’t let him explain because I’m tired of the men in my life making decisions for me. I’m tired of the men in my life thinking they know better than I do about what I can handle and what I can’t.”
I paced the room, muttering, “Do you have any idea how hard it was to keep him a secret?” I stopped and glared at my father. “To keep you a secret? My best friend had an amazing father. One who not only was her date for the father-daughter dance in sixth grade, but he was mine too, because I couldn’t ask my father. I couldn’t tell anyone he was the head of the Irish Mob. You were there for the big moments, but not for all the important ones.
“I didn’t tell you about my wedding because what would be the point? You wouldn’t have walked me down the aisle. You would have been in the back of the room or watching through a window.
“You were always there, but you weren’t. You stayed on the edges of my life. I had a father who told me every day how much he loved me, but no one knew. I was Morgan Delany, the kid without a dad. My whole life I had to listen to kids tease mebecause I didn’t have what they had. But I did have it; I just couldn’t tell anyone. I learned early how to keep secrets.”
“Morgan—”
“No more, Sal. Not tonight. Get a room at the lodge. There’s no point in hiding anymore. When King arrives tomorrow, we’ll sit down and talk.” My mother’s word was final; I saw it in the way my father looked at me.
I wanted to take it all back and get rid of the pain on his face. But I couldn’t. For years I’d been hiding my feelings, not wanting to hurt my father for his absence in my life.
I’d done the same thing with Jude.
I didn’t tell anyone about him or our son. Because I didn’t want the attention. I didn’t want the sympathy or the looks of pity. I hid my emotions behind being the fun friend, the wild friend.
The carefree friend.
I was anything but carefree.
I was hurting inside. And I kept it to myself so I didn’t inconvenience others.
