‘Right,’ Ludlow said. ‘The car looks in good shape to me, but let’s say there was something wrong with it. The break-down advice is to stay with your vehicle, isn’t it? Golden rule, I was told.’
‘Yeah.’ The sergeant caught the note in Nathan’s voice and looked up. Definitely more switched-on than he’d seemed at first, Nathan thought.
‘Yeah but what?’ Ludlow said.
‘Nothing. Just, you use your common sense as well. And Cam knew that. I mean, there’s a bloody road right there. He had plenty of water. If the car wasn’t working and he had to walk anywhere, it would have been to the road, no question. And he would have taken water.’
‘So why –?’
‘I dunno why.’ Nathan could hear his voice rising. ‘I’m just saying. That’s what he would have done. But first choice by an absolute bloody mile, he would have stayed with the car and kept the air con running and got on the radio for help. And if he absolutely had to leave it, he would have walked to the road, not the middle of nowhere.’
‘That’s what Cameron would have done,’ Ludlow said.
‘Yeah.’
‘If he’d wanted to be found?’
Ludlow’s words hung in the air.
‘Yeah, obviously, mate.’ Nathan bristled. ‘Look, I hear what you’re getting at, you can come out and say it.’
To his credit, the cop just gave a small nod of assent. ‘I’m just thinking about what your other brother said. About Cameron perhaps feeling under pressure.’
‘He had access to guns.’
‘Cameron did?’
‘Yeah. Rifle cabinet at home, same as everyone.’
‘There’s no weapon in the car.’
‘No, well, he didn’t carry one around all the time. But at home, he wouldn’t have had any trouble, you know? If he’d wanted to put his hands on one.’
‘So, you think –’
‘I don’t think anything. I’m just saying. If that’s whatyou’rethinking, why wouldn’t he –’ Nathan stopped short. He didn’t say it.
‘It’s a good point,’ Ludlow nodded. ‘But you would have seen what the damage from a gunshot looks like?’
‘Of course. On animals,’ he added.
‘Your brother would be familiar with that too.’
‘So?’
Ludlow’s expression made his face looked strangely older. ‘So maybe nothing. But sometimes people make the mistake of thinking a gun offers an easy way out, and it doesn’t. Mentally, it’s a huge hurdle. An impossible step for some people. Sometimes –’ Ludlow stopped and frowned. He turned his head slowly, taking in the view on all sides. The land was enormous in every direction. ‘Is this one of the highest points around here?’
‘This outcrop isthehighest point around here,’ Nathan said. They used to call it the lookout, not entirely as a joke. ‘Sometimes, what?’
Ludlow didn’t answer as he took a few steps to the rocky edge. He leaned over. Nathan didn’t need to follow him. He knew what was down there.
‘Sometimes, what, mate?’ he repeated. ‘What were you going to say?’
‘Just that sometimes people simply need a way out. And the direct approach isn’t for everybody.’
Nathan took a few steps and joined him on the edge of the lookout. He could feel Xander watching him. Below was a five-metre drop onto a pillow of sand. You’d be lucky to break your ankle, let alone your neck, he knew. It was nowhere near high enough to offer a desperate man a certain escape.
The other direction, though. Nathan turned and looked past his son. To the west. As far as he could see, the land stretched out, deep and open, all the way to the desert. A perfect sea of nothingness. If someone was looking for oblivion, that was the place to find it.
