“I know that,” I reply.“I don’t excuse it even if they did.”
He keeps glaring.I pedal harder.“Is that why you’re pissed?Because I was a drunk idiot?”
“You took away their right to…” He stops talking, and his mouth snaps shut.He shakes his head and stops pedaling.“Fuck it.Just know we aren’t friends, and we won’t be.I can work with you, fine.But don’t try to make it something more like fucking friendship.It won’t be.”
He storms off, his massive hand wrapped so tightly around his water bottle, I’m shocked the bottle isn’t crumbling.Fucking hell.I wish I could go back to him ignoring my existence.I watch him march right out of the locker room.He doesn’t even head to the showers.I finish my cool-down, then give in and ice my shoulder before showering.It’s the worst it’s ever been tonight, and I don’t feel like waiting until I get home.I walk into the hall and head to the medical rooms.We have two treatment rooms, the physio office, the doctor’s office, and a supply room with a standing freezer filled with ice and ice packs.The lights are off as I open the door, so I step into the room and reach back to flip the light on.As the room illuminates, my eyes lock on the two bodies pressed together in the small space between the freezer and the wall.
Ryder Finch and Xavier Gagne.
Xavier steps back with lightning speed, turning a violent stare on me.
Ryder covers his mouth, wiping at it in a panic, and turns his wide eyes to anything but my face.
“Richard!I heard—” Coach’s voice snags.
I spin and see him standing in the open door.His gaze darting from me to Xavier to Ryder, who definitely should not be in one of our training spaces as an opposing player.They have their own room near the visitors’ locker room on the other side of the arena.
“Finch, what are you doing here?”Coach asks.
“I wanted a private moment to talk things out, so I brought him here,” I volunteer without a second thought.“Asked Gagne to join as a mediator.”
Coach folds his arms across his chest.I keep piling on layers to my lie because I feel the awkwardness in the room, like it’s a whole other person, and Coach is perceptive as fuck.“We were talking elsewhere, but I offered him ice for his hand.”
I stride over to the freezer, which looks normal because I was heading that way anyway.I open it, pull out one of our smaller ice packs, and pass it to Finch.He blinks like a deer in headlights, but he takes the pack.I turn to Xavier, who is looking only slightly less apoplectic than Ryder.“Xavier said this wasn’t a good idea.”
“Yeah.Maybe not,” Coach agrees.“But is it working?I don’t think either of you needs some bullshit clogging up your game going forward.So yeah, hash it out.In the hallway.Witnesses are a good thing.”
We all nod, and he turns to leave but glances back at me.“Was coming to congratulate you on the lobster.And now this.Keep it up.”
I nod, and he leaves.The door falls closed behind him, and the room goes silent.“I gotta go.”
Ryder starts toward the door.As he passes me, I ask, “So you’re mad because I outed two other gay players?”
I use the word other on purpose.Because I know what I walked in on.Ryder almost trips over his own feet, and his shoulders pinch.“There are good reasons to stay closeted, and no one should have that taken from them.No matter how drunk you were.And now I have to worry about it.”
I don’t want to get into the nuances of Grady and Landon’s situation —who knew and who didn’t—because it’s irrelevant.“You’re right, and there is absolutely no way for me to go back and change that.But I can be an ally, and I am.For everyone.And I’m sober and this… never happened.”
“Yeah.Okay.”Ryder continues to the door.
“Ry…” Xavier says softly.Ryder just shakes his head and keeps walking.
When he’s gone, it’s like Xavier’s spirit is gone too, and I’m looking at a shell of a man.He blinks, like he’s trying to get the light back in his eyes.“My father is the leader of the Conservative Party in Canada.”
Oh.Okay.I didn’t really pay much attention to Canadian politics, living in Quebec, but I know their version of conservative is the same as ours, and that’s not a good thing for a queer man.I nod when Xavier’s gaze finally finds mine.“Ryder’s dad is a pastor in Georgia.”
“And hockey is homophobic as fuck,” I add.“That’s three strikes.”
“Yeah.See?There are reasons to stay quiet.”Xavier stands taller, pushing his shoulders back.“And now we both have to trust the guy who fucked that up for other people like us.”
“You can trust me.I promise you.”
“No choice but to find out.”
Xavier walks out of the room, leaving me with nothing but the hum of the freezer and a whole lot of guilt.
Chapter12
Lola
