“Please go away. I can’t right now,” I say and my voice sounds so dark.
Jace is going to wander back from the bathroom any minute and if he sees her here he will go off like a cannon. It won’t be pretty. I push the fries away. She’s still standing there. I have no choice. I get off my chair, almost tipping over again, but Patrick reaches out to steady me. I turn and look at her.
She’s been crying—a lot, judging by her blotchy red face and puffy eyes. My heart wants to break for her but it can’t because it’s already in pieces. “Maggie you need to go. I can’t right now. You don’t want me to, trust me. If we talk right now…”
I don’t finish that sentence because I don’t know what will happen, but I know none of it will be good. I’m angry. I’m hurt. I’m confused and scared and frustrated. I’m a lot of horrible things, and I’m too drunk not to take it out on her.
“I just need a second. Just one. Please.”
“No. Fuck just…” I glance over toward the bathroom doors. I see four, thanks to my drunken double vision, instead of the usual two which is not at all helpful. “Fuck.”
I march toward her, take her arm and head toward the doors. I don’t think I’m doing a very good job because I clip two tables on my way and trip as I reach the door, almost falling onto the sidewalk beyond. Maggie helps me stay upright and pushes me back against the brick wall beside the door.
Why does she have to be so pretty, even all puffy-faced? Why do I want to hold her even though she may have ruined my life? “You’re not fair.”
“Daisy did it,” Maggie says.
“How could you let her?”
“I didn’t know until it was too late.”
“You two tell each other everything. Your words.” The disbelief dripping from my voice is something she can’t miss.
“Well she didn’t tell me this,” Maggie replies and the anguish in her pretty eyes is more than apparent. “You think I would do this to you? Now?”
I don’t answer that. “She did it because you told her about us?”
“She did it before I could tell her.”
I tip my head back and feel the rough bricks behind me. “Why didn’t she know? You were supposed to tell her before the game.”
“I know. I tried. It got all screwed up. I’m so sorry.”
“That isn’t going to help me if I lose my scholarship and have to drop out,” I reply angrily.
“It was a mistake.”
“This whole fucking thing has been nothing but mistakes, Maggie,” I blurt out, and she looks like I slapped her.
The door to the Biscuit swings open and Jace is standing there, his eyes narrowed with disdain. “What the hell isshedoing here?”
“I came to explain,” Maggie says.
“Come on. Let’s go,” Jace says to me as he waves me over. Then he turns back to Maggie. “There is no explanation in the world that can make me forgive you for what happened tonight. And I’m going to work like hell to make sure he doesn’t forgive you either.”
“Jace…”
He glares at me. “Shut up and let’s go.”
We walk down the sidewalk to Gran’s little ancient hatchback. He unlocks the passenger door and tries to shove me inside. I don’t want to let him but it seems like my muscles have been replaced by Play-Doh. Jace turns back to Maggie, who must still be standing nearby, as my ass hits the old seat. “I asked him point blank if he trusted you this morning when he told me about the two of you because I wanted to know how he could. Because I didn’t. And it turns out I was right. You might not have done this, but you’re still the reason it happened.”
I turn to get out of the car and tell Jace to leave her alone but he slams the door shut in my face and by the time I get it open again, the sidewalk is empty.
20
Tate
When I turn the corner to start down the long hall to the dean’s office, my heart stops. There’s a girl sitting on one of the benches that lines the administration building hall. And for the split second I think it’s Maggie my heart floods with warmth for the first time since that stupid picture hit the Jumbotron forty-eight hours ago. But then she looks up from her phone and turns to face me and I realize it’s Daisy, and my heart turns cold, back into the dead organ it’s become.
