Prologue
Winnie
Age 16
My youngest sister is giggling and it makes me smile through the pain. “I wish someone had recorded it,” Dixie says. “I would’ve seriously paid money to have been able to see you knock him out.”
“Me too,” I reply and grin sheepishly. “I was blind with rage, so it’s a blur.”
I’m not a violent person. I’ve never punched anyone in my life, nor did I think that I would ever punch someone, let alone do it here. After all, this was my happy place—our family cottage in Maine. I cherish our summers here and nothing really ever stresses or angers me when we’re in this town. But tonight, Holden Hendricks’s mean-spirited teasing and aggressive behavior just made me snap.
Sadie, my other sister, comes rushing in from the kitchen carrying a tea towel filled with ice. “Can you move your fingers?”
“Sort of,” I say as I look down at my red, angry, swelling knuckles. I try to stretch my fingers and then make a fist, but I wince.
“Nothing’s broken,” she whispers as she places the ice on my knuckles. “I don’t think you would be able to move them at all if they were broken.”
“I can’t believe you punched Holden Hendricks,” Dixie says in awe and I immediately shush her. We’re only a few feet from our parents’ bedroom and I’m sure I can hear my dad snoring peacefully through the partially closed door, but that doesn’t mean Mom isn’t awake, listening with her hawk-like hearing.
Sadie plops down on the floor in front of us, her blue eyes twinkling with humor, her wide mouth parted in a smile. “You should have seen it, Dix. He was being such a dick and then boom!”
“Tell me everything!” Dixie begs.
“He found out Cat’s parents were in Boston this weekend and convinced her to have a get-together,” I tell Dixie, who hadn’t come out with us tonight. She’s only thirteen and has an earlier curfew than Sadie and me. “Cat only agreed because she thought it would just be a handful of us. But then all these people she never met started showing up saying Holden had invited them, and the place was packed, upstairs and downstairs and Cat was freaking out. Her neighbor threatened to call the cops from the noise.”
Dixie is glued to every word, like it’s the best story she’s ever heard. She tucks her wheat-blond hair behind her ears, leans forward and rubs her hands together. “Get to the punching.”
Sadie and I both laugh and Sadie picks up the story. “Winnie was helping Cat, trying to get everyone to leave, and that pissed off Hendricks so he told Winnie she was a useless, ugly loser.”
“He called me Cat’s dumb, fugly sidekick,” I correct Sadie.
Dixie’s blue eyes get fiery. “And then you punched him?”
“No, then Jude got in his face and told him he needed to chill out and fuck off,” Sadie says, and Dixie’s eyes get even wider somehow. “And then Holden asked Jude if he wanted to go.”
“Holden was going to fight our brother?” Dixie gasps and I nod.
“Yeah. Totally nuts. Jude is like the one decent person in town who doesn’t hate Holden,” I say and frown. “Anyway, Jude wasn’t gonna fight him, but that seemed to make Holden even angrier and then he grabbed Jude by the shirt and—”
“And Winnie clocked him!” Sadie says gleefully and I can’t help but smile again. “He went down like a sack of potatoes and there was blood. I think she broke his nose.”
My heart stops for a second and I feel genuine remorse. When I first met Holden last summer, I thought he was cute. He played on Jude’s summer league hockey team but unlike us, he was a local who lived here year round. He was almost a year younger than Jude but taller and broader. He was quiet, but polite when Jude invited him over for dinner one night. Then they decided to go to the movies with a bunch of other local friends, and Sadie and I tagged along. He became a different person without my parents around. He was loud and obnoxious and teased everyone in a mean, hard way, not a lighthearted one. Then the next time I ended up hanging out with him and a bunch of other people, he started a fistfight with someone. That’s when I decided to avoid him, but in a tiny town like this, it proved impossible. And for some reason, Jude actually liked hanging out with him. Even though I punched him, and he really did deserve it, I hope I didn’t break his nose.
“Don’t! Stop looking all repentant and crap,” Sadie says, and I swear sometimes she’s eighteen years older than me, not eighteen months younger. She acts the most mature out of all four of us siblings and she’s definitely the most sensible. She looks at Dixie. “Holden deserved it. He’s deserved it all summer long. Her fist was simply karma’s delivery vehicle.”
I can’t help but smile. I like the idea of being karma’s instrument. Sadie leans forward, lifts the ice and looks at my hand again. “We need to figure out what we’re going to tell Mom and Dad because it’s still going to be swollen in the morning.”
“I fell?”
“Dad won’t buy it.” Sadie shakes her head, long sleek blond hair tumbling around her shoulders. I self-consciously lift my hand to my own hair. The humidity this summer in Maine has been off the charts and so the waves that started in my dirty blond hair when I hit puberty have turned to a frizz I’ve yet to find a way to tame.
“How about you dropped something on it?” Dixie says.
Suddenly the front door slams and we all jump like terrified mice. Jude storms into the living room. His face is flushed and his eyes electric with anger. We have a sibling pact to be as quiet as possible when coming home so we don’t wake up our parents. We also have a pact to keep each other’s secrets and screwups from our parents at all costs, but clearly our pacts don’t apply tonight—not for Jude. Sadie and Dixie scramble to their feet. I stay frozen in place. “You are a fucking jerk, you know that?” he yells at me.
“Fuck you!” I yell back.
“Shut up!” Sadie scream-whispers, which at this point is useless. There is no way our parents aren’t awake by now.
