I still want to push him on this issue, but I force myself not to. “You’re right. You should distract me with another horrendous pickup line.”
He takes a step toward me and gently wraps an arm around my back, his hand resting on my hip. “I would have taken you right there on the bathroom sink if they hadn’t interrupted.”
I feel a tingle between my legs, like my girl bits are agreeing with his statement. “I was hoping that would happen. But I’m glad it didn’t. It would have complicated this already difficult situation.”
“But it felt like it was worth it,” he tells me quietly. “You feel like you’re worth it.”
And just like that, I’m breathless.
“I still want you,” he tells me simply.
“I still want you too,” I admit with just as much ease. God, it’s so easy to say. Why can’t it be easy to do?
“So what are we going to do about it?”
He’s waiting for my response.
“There’s nothing we can do about it now,” I tell him. “My life is complicated right now, and I need to stay focused. You do too.”
His beautiful green eyes bore into me, as if searching for something—a flicker of doubt, maybe—but he doesn’t find any. As much as I’m attracted to him, I am not risking my career over him. I won’t.
My Lyft pulls up to the curb, and as I walk toward it so does Eli. I turn and press a hand to the front of his gladiator chest plate. “You can’t get in this car with me.”
“Why not? I want to make sure you get home okay,” he argues.
“Because we’ll sleep together again,” I say bluntly. “I won’t be able to stop myself, and that’s not going to make anything easier, only harder.”
“Speaking of hard…” He grins.
“Stop,” I demand but a smile is overtaking my face. “We can’t. You know that.”
“I know,” he admits, growing solemn. “Can I at least get a kiss good-bye? On the cheek?”
I rock up on my tiptoes and press my lips to his cheek for an embarrassingly long time but it feels so good and he isn’t complaining. But then his hands wrap around my waist and I can feel his hard length against my stomach and I’m instantly wet and there’s a pulse like a snare drum between my legs, and that’s when I know I have to walk away. I pull back and he doesn’t fight me. But he does cup the back of my head and whisper, “I’m going to get off tonight thinking of you. Of what it’s going to be like next time—because there will be a next time. Promise me.”
“I promise,” I whisper back.
I am a fool. Playing with fire and making promises I don’t know how to keep.
18
Elijah
I barely got three hours’ sleep last night. After Dixie got in the car I walked all the way back to my hotel, and then Jasper called to tell me about his night and how the team misses me and how jealous he is I was called up. He tried to ask a million questions about what it’s been like and how it’s going, but I know he watches the games and he knows how it’s going. So I evaded the questions, and after we hung up I took a long hot shower and then ignored all common sense and unwritten rules and sent Dixie a selfie in the bathroom mirror. I’m naked and wet holding a towel in front of my cock, barely covering it, but I’m also standing sideways so the side profile of my ass is on full display. I cut my head off, though, so no one can identify me. I figured she wouldn’t get it until she woke up, but fifteen minutes later I had a text from her.
Are you butt dialing? Because I swear that ass is calling me.
I’m still chuckling when she sends another.
Get some sleep or the Saints will hand that perfect ass to you tomorrow.
It was everything we both knew we shouldn’t be doing, but for the first time since I joined the team I felt grounded and centered again.
Coach started Eddie, and for the first time since being called up, I’m enjoying being on the bench. Okay, enjoying it might be an overstatement, but I’m at peace with it. Eddie had a good first period, only letting in one goal. But we’re only five minutes into the second and he’s let in two more, and both of them looked weak. He should have stopped them—at least I know that’s what the coach is thinking. As a goalie, I also know not everything is how it looks from the bench.
Levi finishes a shift and hops over the boards. I can hear him swearing all the way down at the end of the bench. “Jude, I need you to fucking score and get this thing back.”
“Yes, Captain.” Jude grins and winks at my brother. “I’m on it.”
