Faith eases back against me, obviously knowing it isn’t easy for me to hear my mother talk that way about herself. It hurts. But from that pain will come renewed strength. I’m seeing it firsthand for myself.
Robert has the grace to look ashamed as he glances at the floor before meeting Savannah’s stare once more. “Look. I’m no angel, we both know this.”
“That’s an understatement,” I mutter.
My father ignores the dig. “I’m a prick. I’ve done shitty things to Emma and the rest of my kids. I never knew how to handle the dual life. I actually felt guilty about hiding you all, and I took it out on them, not giving them the parent they deserved. I didn’t love their mother, so I wasn’t good to them. I can’t justify it…” He trails off, then looks down at his hands, which he is twisting together.
“Robert,” she begins.
He draws a deep breath, pauses, then says, “Please let me finish. I love you, Savannah. I always did. I’m weak. I never admitted that before. But I want the life I have with you.”
I glance at my mother to find tears trickling from her eyes. Faith clasps my hand tight.
I blow out a long breath. If I have to say whether or not I believe my father… the best I can say is I think Robert believes his own words. Does it change anything? Do I trust the man to change? Hell, no.
“Well? Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?” Robert asks.
I hold my breath, and so does Faith by my side.
“No.” My mother rises to her feet, her pretty silver dress sparkling and seeming too nice for this awkward moment. “You cheated on your first wife. You cheated on me. You’re a no-good,worthless excuse for a man, and I’m done. I’m going to like myself for a change, and for that to happen, I need to get rid of you.”
Robert jumps up, surprise on his face. He really thought Savannah would forgive and forget. “But—”
“No. The door is this way.”
Faith and I remain sitting, letting my mother precede my father to the door. I hear mumbling and then the door opens and slams shut. I assume my father is gone. Footsteps tell me my mother is going directly to her room.
“Are you okay?” Faith asks softly.
I shift in my seat so I can meet her gaze. “Yeah. This family drama? I’m becoming immune.” I manage a laugh. “Or at least I’ve learned to distance myself from it. But I’m so damned proud of my mother.”
“She is pretty awesome,” Faith says, resting her head on my shoulder. “It’ll be okay, you know.”
I pull her tight, breathing in her sweet scent. “Yeah.” On the family stuff?
I agree.
On life in general? That is anyone’s guess.
***
Faith
The next morning,Savannah, looking strong and satisfied with her decision, breaks the news that Sienna asked her to come stay with her. She doesn’t have a nanny, nor does she want one, though her husband can well afford it. But she does need her mother, and since Savannah is here, Sienna wants her. And Savannah is thrilled to help with the baby and spend time with her granddaughter.
A win-win all the way around, I think, as I sit sharing my last cup of coffee with the woman I’ve come to like a great deal. Savannah is warm and friendly, genuine and real.
“It’s been nice getting to know you,” I say, glancing at Jason’s mother over my coffee cup.
The other woman smiles. “I feel the same way.”
“You remind me of my mom,” I say.
Savannah tips her head to the side. “You miss her.”
I nod over the lump in my throat. “It’s hard. And I had her necklace that she wore every day, but my brother took it when he ransacked my apartment.” I wipe at a tear that falls. “Jason has his PI looking for it in pawnshops, but I’ve resigned myself to the fact that it’s lost forever.”
Which seems to be a theme in my life. Things lost to me. My father. My mother. Even my brother. All gone. And one day soon, Jason will be, too.
